There are these sorts of people who hang around like gnats. . . doing fly-by’s, buzzing you in your little self imposed ivory tower. . . you smack your hands together, trying to crush them but they somehow always escape, so you keep trying to smack them between your hands over and over, until you finally believe that killing them is impossible, and they just believe you are applauding them. … Continue reading →
When a relationship ends, you begin to think of all the negative things about that person. Sometimes that’s a coping mechanism that helps you deal with the loss, and sometimes it’s clarity. You must step away from something to truly see it. If you’re glued to the side of something, you really have no idea what the other side of it looks like. But if you manage to rip yourself apart from it, you might lose skin, but the new one you grow will be thicker and more resilient– more capable of suffering the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune. … Continue reading →
I believe there is someone out there for everyone. More pointedly–someone out there for everyone at each stage in their life. I am not the same as I was 5 years ago, or even one year ago. I am constantly evolving. Constant evolution breeds chain reactions that reach our environment, other people, situations… Therefore, things shift. Lives re-align. I also believe that wishes and intentions are powerful. Thoughts are things. I really believe that. So if I keep focusing on what I want, I believe it will happen when and how it’s supposed to. In the meantime, I will try … Continue reading →
DISCLAIMER: in recent years, Glenn Beck has become an extremist zealot, for which i have NO respect at all. But when he first became known, I enjoyed his show and him. Now, he’s just another nutjob conservative who is part of the problem. Political Correctness, I believe is doing more harm than good in this country…I think I agree with Glenn Beck on this matter, if only in part. His deeper point seems to be that braille on the bathrooms or on a coffee pot for that matter, does not address the real issue, which is rational solutions for accessibility. … Continue reading →
There’s always a nut out there who thinks the whole world is out to get them. But as the saying goes, it’s not paranoia if they really are after you. In my recent quest to overhaul my mental, physical, spiritual, emotional health, i have done tons of research, and have come to several disquieting solutions that sound rather paranoid when i say them aloud to anyone else. But i truly believe in these conclusions i have drawn, and for whatever it’s worth, i mention them here, in case they strike a cord with someone else who is also searching for … Continue reading →
Recently, I was offered a publishing contract on my novel Achilles Forjan. I allowed myself to get all excited and when the hard copy of the contract came, I realized it was not the same as the “sample.” I didn’t like the idea of handing over the rights to my own book for SEVEN years. I didn’t know this publisher well enough to entrust my work for such a long time. And then there was being at the mercy of their idea of what my work was, what it should look like, how it should be edited, and then how … Continue reading →
Not long ago, it came to my attention that I have some rather irritating trends in my work. Namely, the names. Titles, I mean. My first “slew” of books all begin with “A.” Achilles Forjan, Armchair Detective, As You Were, Another Justice. . .[addendum: later, came Also Known as DNA]. I’m not sure if it’s some deep-seated Alphabetical Addiction, or merely a subconscious belief that my writing is still at the beginning . . . perhaps I am working my way through the alphabet, like some popular mystery writers (A is for Annoying). Now that would be sufficient to vex … Continue reading →
I have always been interested in the subject/discipline/pseudo-science of psychology. I have been through my own dark nights of the soul. I have had various diagnoses for conditions caused by biology, physiology, environment, upbringing, life challenges and issues…most of us have. But in going through all of these, I made a concerted effort to understand myself, the effect that various experiences had on me as an individual, and I explored every possibility and option for healing myself, without allowing myself to entirely fall prey to the victim mentality that I was completely helpless. I have also known many people … Continue reading →
Take one part sexual frustration, two parts loneliness, three parts overwhelming need to be needed and wanted, add an overzealous good-timer and beer, stir vigorously. Simmer well in a bed of cotton sheets, and you have a recipe for disaster. When one hits the bottom of the Desperation Barrel, there is always someone down there. Sometimes we make ill-advised choices based on the ingredients we allow ourselves to stock. While we might not be proud of these one night stands that last months or years, we must appreciate the educational value of such an excursion. If we learn our lessons … Continue reading →
Certain situations and combination of events and feelings coincide and then all existential hell breaks loose in me. I’ve gotten off on a track of thinking that has led me to this point of stress, angst, emotional upheaval. Partly, the stress stems from this Guitar Bar idea becoming more about me, and less about the venue. More pointedly, the stress of defining myself. Identity markers. Strip away those and we fall apart, evaporate, cease to exist or are merely taking up space. How do we stay balanced in our understanding of success? Is success represented by money? by acknowledgment of … Continue reading →
