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Kelli Jae Baeli

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Home→Published 2012 → May

Monthly Archives: May 2012

Birds & Bees (with giggling)

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on May 14, 2012 by Kelli Jae BaeliMarch 6, 2013

NOTE TO READER: I’ve always found the word “chicken” to be comical. I don’t know why. Thus, I will be giggling as I write about them. So…. How exactly do birds do it? Let’s use chickens, [hehehe] shall we? Roosters fancy themselves clever little bastards. If they want to mate, they’ll call the hens out to dinner–which is usually grain on the ground. He lets them start their dinner and then when they are focused on that, he moves in for the kill, without so much as a smooth pick-up line.   We’ve all got that image of a rooster … Continue reading →

Posted in CREATURES, procreation, eggs, HUMOR, birds, bees | Tagged reproduction, mating, kama sutra, hornets | 2 Replies

Pickles, Chills, & Snakes

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on May 8, 2012 by Kelli Jae BaeliAugust 26, 2015

[This is another writing exercise between me and another writer. We each come up with a subject and both blog it, and don’t see each other’s version until after we’ve posted. It was my turn, and I suggested three unrelated nouns, made to relate in one piece. I chose pickles, chills and snakes.] FADE IN INT. HOUSE – DAY Two people are standing in front of a fireplace, warming their hands. We’ll call them MELANIE and BARBARA. They have been reading Dr. Seuss books all evening and are now taking a break. BARBARA reaches over and swipes her hand across … Continue reading →

Posted in WRITING, snakes, HUMOR, AUTHORS, Kelli Jae Baeli, blogging | Tagged writing exercise, chills, pickles, script, Dr. Seuss | Leave a reply

Cows With Guns

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on May 7, 2012 by Kelli Jae BaeliMarch 6, 2013

My beloved and I have made this pact, starting yesterday, that we would pick a subject and blog it separately, just to see what each of us would come up with. My suggestion yesterday was “Are writers born or made?” Hers, for today, was “Cows with Guns.” Guess which one of us is more cerebral, and which one the goob? She also informed me that the title is from a song called “Cows with guns.” Who knew? I didn’t even do any research on that one except to glance over a Wikipedia page and notice it was the title of … Continue reading →

Posted in WRITING, cows, Eddie Izzard, HUMOR, Kelli Jae Baeli, blogging, guns | Tagged freewriting, Minnie Driver, Men at Work | Leave a reply

Are Writers Born or Made?

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on May 7, 2012 by Kelli Jae BaeliAugust 26, 2015

I was discussing this topic with another writer, and as is my tendency, I wallow in the gray areas. A simple answer is never forthcoming and requires examination. So if I were to answer the question of whether writers are born or made, I’d have to say Both. And then I would have to wade through the morass of That-Depends toward the destination of Picker of Nits. The first question I would throw back is “What do you mean by writer?” One could be a writer, in that she actually WRITES. But it doesn’t automatically ensure the writing is any … Continue reading →

Posted in AUTHORS, writer, WRITING LIFE, editing, bad writing, Fiction Writing | Leave a reply

Writing Tips: To Know, To Begin, To Feel

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on May 6, 2012 by Kelli Jae BaeliAugust 26, 2015

As a writer, I am always in training. Like any vocation, it can be mastered to some degree if the individual cares enough about it. One thing I have noticed along the way, is that I have used certain phrases and words which do not serve the story in quality, plot or character development, or even in achieving clean, sharp examples of good craft. Most of these examples refer to rough drafts, as I have been writing for 25 years, and cannot be excused for doing this in a final version, but still, it comes up in the editing process … Continue reading →

Posted in WRITING CRAFT, Kelli Jae Baeli, writer, Writing tips, editing, bad writing, WRITING | Tagged revision | Leave a reply

Quotes from Kelli Jae Baeli

"I guess that work I did in my Card-Carrying-Harpy support group really paid off. There will be no tearing of flesh today."

Politics Quotes

"People feel removed from sexism. 'I'm not a sexist, but I'm not a feminist.' They think there's this fuzzy middle ground. There's no fuzzy middle ground. You either believe that women are people or you don't. It's that simple." (Joss Whedon)

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betise buh-TEEZ lack of understanding, perception, or the like, stupidity. A stupid or foolish act or remark. Something inconsequential or without merit, absurdity, trifle.

Favorite Quotes

"Atheists are routinely asked how people will know not to rape and murder without religion telling them not to do it, especially a religion that backs up the orders with threats of hell. Believers, listen to me carefully when I say this: When you use this argument, you terrify atheists. We hear you saying that the only thing standing between you and Ted Bundy is a flimsy belief in a supernatural being made up by pre-literate people trying to figure out where the rain came from. This is not very reassuring if you’re trying to argue from a position of moral superiority." ~Amanda Marcotte

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