I was on my way to my friend’s house, delivering Frappuccinno and a Snickers crunch bar, and prepared to provide a massage because her back was “killing her.” (Oh the things we do in the middle of the night for friends). The journey through the dark countryside on a blacktop road was a ripe situation for dreamy vestiges. I’m not sure i really did hallucinate, and i may never know…

But there i was, winding around the wooded road, trying to keep my eyes peeled for feeding deer that often wander near the shoulders, and my eyes caught the darting form, a dark arrow of fur, scuttling across in front of me, toward the woods. I slowed, and as i passed the little form, i could swear it was a tiny black kitten, sitting there with soupy eyes, begging for me to stop and rescue it from a life of eating bugs and dodging the vehicular bullets that swept past each day and night.

What if it was synchronicity? What if i was meant to rescue this kitten? What if i was supposed to pull it, mewling from the brush, pick the stickers out if its fur and take it home to shower it with affection, give it a can of tuna and a saucer of milk? I was already a little maudlin about the impending adoption as i pulled to a stop.

It was 3 a.m., and traffic was almost non-existent. Since I couldn’t find a place to turn around, i moved to the other lane and drove in that lane in reverse back toward the kitten. I figured if another vehicle did appear in the lane, i would at least be moving in the same direction as them, and if a car came in the other lane, it would be like passing me, except my vehicle was pointed in the wrong direction, but moving in the right one…

After a period of time, i couldn’t find the little kitten, so i continued to my friend’s house, (in the correct lane, and in DRIVE, not REVERSE…)

SIDEBAR: i wonder why the display on the gear box doesn’t say REVERSE and FORWARD? What kind of sense does it make to say REVERSE and DRIVE? Why not DRIVE and NOT-DRIVE? It’s like, “I now pronounce you MAN and WIFE. Not HUSBAND and WOMAN? It’s like, if you put the car into DRIVE, you will magically be driven, and you can sit back and read the paper and have a cup of coffee while you are shuttled to your destination…

Back to the kitten…

I was already a little sad that i was unable to find the creature, save it, offer it sanctuary.

A few nights later, a repeat performance had me on the same road toward my friends house. As i swung around the corners in the dark, ever vigilant for foraging deer and possums and raccoons, i thought of the kitten. …Wondered if it was still out there in the darkness, afraid and hungry. As i came to the bend in the road where i had seen the kitten a few nights before, i watched carefully, just in case the kitten had some little feline lean-to in that area of the woods and would wander out to the road to hitchhike for a new owner…

And Behold. There it was. I swear. The kitten, sitting by the side of the road…what were the chances? Was the Universe telling me i didn’t try hard enough the last time? I drove quite a distance until i found a place to turn around and returned, determined to answer the calling of human kindness…i had the same feeling i get when i watch one of those movies on Lifetime (Television for Women and Gay Men). I searched the opposite side of the road. I didn’t see it. Turning around again, i searched on my way back by, toward my original destination, and still did not see the kitten.

If there was a kitten.

But why would i see the same thing twice in the same location, unless it existed? And if the Universe really wanted me to save this kitten, why didn’t it tell the little creature to stay put?

I continued to my destination, feeling just a little punked.