Category Archives: disillusionment

Apple in my Eye

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I’m done with you, Apple. You hear me? Done. I can recall the joy I felt when I got my first iPhone. I was thrilled with the phone, and I used it for everything, and it made my life so much easier. I was in love with it. Now, the honeymoon is over. The love didn’t just fade, it was like continued infidelity. Spousal abuse. After the last few years of Apple’s proprietary restrictions, the constant purposeful inconveniences. To wit: …repetitive requests to logon after every update, which happened whether i was currently using the phone or not, the inability … Continue reading →

Is it Goodreads or Badreaders?

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I’ve always believed that every ill in our society falls under one or more of three categories: Greed, Ignorance or Zealotry. I was faced with an example of one or more of these while updating my author page on Goodreads. I came across a negative review, quite by accident, of one of my earlier books. Against my better judgment, I read it, and was horrified. The reviewer, obviously, did not like my book, and that’s fine, in and of itself, but this reviewer made statements that were patently false. She claimed the character in my book was “helping a pedophile.” … Continue reading →

Thoughts on The Thief of Time by John Boyles

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I have missed sitting down with a physical book and reading. My recent decision to take a sabbatical and just allow myself to be creative and deadline-free, had me standing in front of my fiction bookshelf, seeking something new. Something enjoyable. As most of you know by now, I have become quite finicky about my fiction reading. I read so much of my own work in pumping out work in the last ten years, that I have had little time to read for pleasure, and when I do, it’s inevitably just before I go to sleep, and by then, my … Continue reading →

To my readers: Be brave, be strong

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  TO ALL YOU LOVELY READERS: There are formidable challenges ahead of us. This will be hard. So take some time to enjoy nature, to read, as you always do, if you need to get yourself grounded. But then do your part to make things better. If I’ve learned one thing by studying human nature and writing about it all these years, I’ve learned that the human spirit is also formidable. We’ll get through this. Be brave, even when you feel scared. Be strong, even as your hands shake. Smile and hug people. Show love and compassion and resiliency, even … Continue reading →

Don’t Make me Unfriend You

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When you blend your professional and personal life on Facebook, there will inevitably be instances where the two collide, and not in a good way. Some people might like your writing and be big fans who buy all your books, while they simultaneously make snarky comments to personal posts you make, regarding, say political issues–even when they are not, themselves, properly informed of the issues and the ramifications thereof. If they can’t see the forest for the trees, perhaps it’s time to stop venturing blindly into territory for which they have no map. The hateful rhetoric in our political milieu, … Continue reading →

We the People, Saying NO

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Negativity. It’s not just a mindset anymore, now it’s a natural result of watching national election events. I’m talking about the negativity that arises naturally from watching the masses trail along the demi-gods like lemmings, believing the most obvious and outrageous lies, with no compunction about checking the facts on their own. The hatred, the vitriol, the dirty-dealing, right under everyone’s noses while no one ever gets held accountable. Maybe it’s more accurately disillusionment, but that word doesn’t seem strong enough. But it disgusts me. I see so much potential for us to have a peaceful, loving, integrity-filled world, but … Continue reading →

Don’t be part of the problem

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If you’re not part of the solution, you’re part of the problem. We’ve all heard that mantra, but it’s true. Recently, I was caught at just the right moment (inopportune, maybe) by a post a “writer” made, asking for help with formatting, and lamenting how hard it was and wondering why she had to worry about it at all. Her posts throughout also revealed that she could not even handle a few sentences without making errors. And then there were all the commenters helping her like she was a child. So I posted an angry comment. I don’t like to … Continue reading →

Adventures in Indie Publishing, Incident #227:

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Amazon informed me that they pulled my book, Rain Falls, off sale, because they were getting too many complaints from readers about a chunk of missing text in the digital version. I realized immediately what was happening, and I rolled my eyes so hard, I could see my brain. My apparently way-too-clever brain. I made adjustments in the file to accommodate this, and added this note to readers in the front:   SPECIAL NOTE TO READERS Recently, Amazon pulled this book down, because too many readers were complaining about missing text. Apparently, those readers did not understand that the missing … Continue reading →

Going Mainstream

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CAUTION: FRUSTRATED RANT HOVERING NEARBY. When you find yourself, as a writer, lamenting about why you’re even writing at all, and entertaining the idea of not writing any more, something has to change. I’m growing more and more frustrated with, and weary of, the lack of support from Lesbian Readers for what I want to offer them. I am sick to death of their constant praise of bad writing in the LesFic market, and their unwillingness to demand better, and try anything out of their narrow reading interests. It’s painfully clear that most LesFic Readers have literary blinders, and will … Continue reading →

Stupid, Honorable, High-Road Seeking Fool

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In a post from a few years ago (two posts, actually, under Going to Denver Because You’re Dead) I chronicled this transition of moving to Colorado to start a new life; again reinventing myself, with the hope of somehow finding my new place in this ever-changing, ever-challenging world.  I got rid of three-quarters of everything i owned, packed a U-Haul trailer behind my Cherryot, and off I went. A journey that lasted 30 hours on many days of little sleep. By the time I arrived in Denver, i was exhausted, lost, and had this sensation of being on another planet. … Continue reading →

The Fourth Betrayal

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NOTE: So, in my seeking help when i needed it, for my recent betrayals and abandonments, the counselor i went to see called the next day to inform me she couldn’t see me anymore and for a really stupid reason. I tried to reason with her on the phone, but she had to stand by what she felt was her principals, but which was only LOFTY IDEAS getting in the way of her ability to give the actual care she had sworn to as a medical professional. Finally frustrated beyond words and feeling even worse, i hung up on her. … Continue reading →

Why not Me?

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Pulitzer and Nobel Prize-winning author, Pearl S. Buck  said, “A human creature born abnormally, inhumanely sensitive. To them… a touch is a blow, a sound is a noise, a misfortune is a tragedy, a joy is an ecstasy, a friend is a lover, a lover is a god, and failure is death. Add to this cruelly delicate organism the overpowering necessity to create, create, create~ so that without the creating of music or poetry or books or buildings or something of meaning, their very breath is cut off…They must create, must pour out creation. By some strange, unknown, inward urgency … Continue reading →

Letter to a Battered Heart

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Open letter to a friend whose heart is battered…. I remember that you were there for me when I was going through a lot and had no one. So I will do my best to be here for you, now. In this life, you have to separate your mental and emotional things, your habits, your beliefs–like laundry. Whites over there, colors over there, delicates there. You can’t throw them all in together or the colors will bleed and what was once pure and white is now sullied. Some things must be kept apart, some things put together, and you always … Continue reading →

Hanging the Moon and Lesbian Monikers

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I placed another personal ad on Craigslist. Hopefully this won’t turn into a freak-fest like it did last time. And if it does, well, more material for my writing. LOL. The Ad I used before was way more humorous, but I was afraid it might be overwhelming and make ME look a little crazy. Who knows? Here’s the one I used before: Only seek LOCAL friends & dates. Please & thank you. LDR’s are usually doomed from the start. It’s like being pecked to death by chickens. So not big on them unless you can afford to travel to date … Continue reading →

Book Review: Valencia

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One of the reasons I began writing lesbian fiction 25 years ago, was because I could not, at that time, find a kindred spirit in them. I could not relate to those characters, and their lives. The women in the pages of the lesbian fiction I read back then did not represent me, nor anyone I knew, or wanted to know. This offended me greatly. As for the book, Valencia, itself, the author does have some writing talent and I did notice a periodic turn of a phrase or insightful comment, but overall, these positives were overshadowed by everything else. … Continue reading →