nostalgia Archives ⋆

Is This How it Starts?

Posted on March 22, 2015 by Kelli Jae BaeliMarch 22, 2015

Supine, in the bed for that nap I’m supposed to honor every day now, I was struck by an epiphany… What if my life has been lived? What if I’m now going to settle into that twilight of routine and isness? What if the main dish has been served, and all that’s left is the dessert and the check? It’s not as if I feel I need new adventures or challenges. I WANT things to slow down. In fact, I could not withstand more of what I’ve already endured. But the really sobering aspect still remains. I lived most of … Continue reading →

Singing, Snoring & Joy

Posted on March 11, 2015 by Kelli Jae BaeliMarch 11, 2015

Something happened to me. I was applying formatting to print file for one of my books, feeling the dessicated adrenal supplement coursing through my veins, and i was singing along to Shawn Colvin on “Get out of this house”, formatting, and feeling pretty damn good…and then i just started crying…not from sadness. It was a sensation I hadn’t felt in such a long time…one I can only describe as the elusive feeling of pure JOY. It made me want to perform again, write songs again. Buy a guitar to use until i could get mine from storage…I could barely sing … Continue reading →

ADRIFT (poem)

Posted on January 15, 2015 by Kelli Jae BaeliJanuary 15, 2015

Tossed, blown off course by the storm, My skin pink from previous sunlight, I stand on the deck and imagine she is there waiting for me to reach shore If I can just glimpse her in the distance like a soothing port of call I know I’ll find my way. But when the sail lies flaccid and I am adrift in the water, I think I can hear the gurgling below, Seeping in, Weighing me down. My vessel riding low in the lapping waves. And bailing water, I ache for the succor of her embrace, The softness of her lips … Continue reading →

To Sleep, Perchance To Dream (poem)

Posted on March 1, 2012 by Kelli Jae BaeliMarch 1, 2012

What magic what survived the holocaust of the bitter edged sword, its flailing sparks upon the stone of US, is drawing a last breath. Seeking peace, I closed my drying eyes, and fell into the netherworld of unreal things, wished real‑ And you, with your lofty, oblivious loyalty, bent to kiss my lonely lips, And for that sharp moment all was as it had been THEN. My brain uninformed, drowsy‑ reality a stone’s throw away, but pale beside the stronger images of THEN‑ Shrouded and sealed in that trustplace, Sleep. from … Continue reading →

Turn Turn, Turn: the Phantom Ex

Posted on July 22, 2009 by Kelli Jae BaeliMarch 6, 2013

Okay, again, my heart is pounding, and again, I am off balance, trying to sooth my trembling hands… I’m not one to go around asking for advice. I’m usually only giving it, but I just might need some insight from my Facebook friends. I just found a message on my phone from…..GUESS WHO? The Ex. The one who wrote that inscription to me, and the the one that I suppose is at the root of all this crap with Becky Haynes. It’s surprisingly nerve-wracking to hear the voice of a person you were in love with over a decade … Continue reading →

Turn, Turn, Turn

Posted on July 21, 2009 by Kelli Jae BaeliMarch 6, 2013

{reposted from Facebook} I just had a really unsettling experience. I’m trying right now to just calm my thumping heart, and take a breath. One thing that is no secret about me, is that I don’t have many secrets. I am pretty open. I have to be, because I am a creative person who produces creative material. But I don’t pretend that I’m so special that i don’t have a day to day life with day to day struggles and victories that i wish to share with those in my life. Nor do I pretend that human nature is always … Continue reading →

LP Wallpaper

Posted on November 16, 2002 by Kelli Jae BaeliNovember 16, 2002

When compact discs became the norm for music media in 1983, I was excited by it, the possibilities of them lasting longer, being easier to store and sounding better….but remember being so disappointed that the days of those large albums were coming to a close……once in an apartment in Oklahoma, i attached all my vinyl record collection to the wall with Funtac, corners touching, so there was this kind of checkerboard effect of the album covers…and when i wanted to listen to any music, i’d walk over to the wall and pull the disc out and put it on the … Continue reading →