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Kelli Jae Baeli

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Home→Categories HEALTH→fatigue

Category Archives: fatigue

Is This How it Starts?

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on March 22, 2015 by Kelli Jae BaeliMarch 22, 2015

Supine, in the bed for that nap I’m supposed to honor every day now, I was struck by an epiphany… What if my life has been lived? What if I’m now going to settle into that twilight of routine and isness? What if the main dish has been served, and all that’s left is the dessert and the check? It’s not as if I feel I need new adventures or challenges. I WANT things to slow down. In fact, I could not withstand more of what I’ve already endured. But the really sobering aspect still remains. I lived most of … Continue reading →

Posted in truth, memoir genre, fear, angst, loneliness, sadness, triggers, HIGHLY SENSITIVE PERSON (HSP), panic, Xanax, nostalgia, truthiness, fatigue, EMOTIONS | 8 Replies

EXTENDED STRESS Hotel.

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on April 2, 2011 by Kelli Jae BaeliDecember 5, 2011

My Cherryot was loaded to capacity, with the things I thought I’d need for two months, until an apartment became available.   At Extended Stay, I checked in with desk clerk–started to unload, and had to take several things up first (5 trips in elevator) before I noticed that there was a luggage cart in front with a tattooed guy leaning on it talking to another guy. “Oh a luggage cart!” I said. “I need that.” He said he only had a couple of things and rushed off to get his task done so I could have it. Meantime, I … Continue reading →

Posted in depression, HIGHLY SENSITIVE PERSON (HSP), disillusionment, moving, stress, sensitivity, anger, Colorado, rudeness, panic, betrayal, Cherryot, RELATIONSHIPS, Xanax, Biscuit, fatigue, sadness, domestic violence, conflict, disability, money, anxiety, Driving, iPhone, harsh realities, apartment, fear, cats, bad customer service, Monkey, desperation, conversations, frustration, Sensory Processing Sensitivity, annoying people, crisis | Tagged fire alarm, Arby's, luggage, hotel, hysteria, packing | Leave a reply

Vamoosing

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on March 29, 2011 by Kelli Jae BaeliMarch 11, 2013

Suspended my Netflix account. Still packing, desperately needing boxes. Downstairs, I pulled up everything in that storage room, which was the contents brought so far from storage when I actually thought I was going to be living here permanently, and her mother had finally moved, so I could do that. But only after we had ripped up the carpet down there and cleaned the unbelievable nastiness her mother lived in. bleach fumes, up and down stairs, aching body. I realized I would have to leave some things behind because it wouldn’t fit in my car or in storage, and I … Continue reading →

Posted in experience, injury, HEALTH, anxiety, frustration, money, courage, lesbians, PEEVES, change, strength, depression, DOMESTICA, coping skills, Human Nature, Facebook, lies, aggravation, harsh realities, LAW, Driving, Relocation, disillusionment, life, mental illness, court, fear, U-Haul, abuse, PHILOSOPHY, RELATIONSHIPS, crisis, arrest, friendship, TRAVEL, anger, Sociology, fatigue, moving, angst, storage, betrayal, cats, pain, Colorado, chaos, domestic partnership, sadness, CHALLENGES & MISHAPS, conflict, singlehood, disability, EMOTIONS, problem-solving, herniated disc, desperation, domestic violence, police, CURRENT AFFAIRS, exes, liars, PSYCHOLOGY, stairs, sacrifice | Tagged Netflix, packing, victim, probation, loss, credit, breakups, cowardice, hotel | Leave a reply

Going to Denver Because You’re Dead (2)

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on August 4, 2009 by Kelli Jae BaeliMarch 5, 2013

In this second installment, I am on my way, the tone of the journey being set right away in Joplin, a mere 60 minutes from my starting place… Fri August 1 at 9:08am~ Jae:: in Joplin at loves truckstop. Having food and getting ice for my neck. It’s swelling. It’s tedious already driving 45mph I feel like I’m going to CO on horseback. Veep: but not bareback…..right? Jae: Yes, bareback, where all the trouble is to be found. First, i get back on the exit and take the wrong turn, winding up on an access road next to the interstate, … Continue reading →

Posted in injury, ATHEISM, fatigue, Facebook, atheist humor, experience, Relocation, Sociology, Driving, U-Haul, CHALLENGES & MISHAPS, phobias, TRAVEL, EMOTIONS, friendship, anxiety, GADGETS, PSYCHOLOGY, Lakewood, HUMOR, Denver, HEALTH, danger, Sleep, moving, panic, stress, Colorado, iPhone, life, herniated disc, RELIGION, RELATIONSHIPS | Tagged rain, Kansas, Missouri, GPS | 1 Reply

On the Heels of…

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on June 20, 2009 by Kelli Jae BaeliMarch 5, 2013

  I had a marathon conversation last night with an ex from 10 years ago; and reconnected with her (Terra), via something she came across in my blog. The last half of the conversation created a feeling of great discomfort for me–both then, and this morning. My dreams were filled with people from the past, and anxiety tinted the start of my day. I was aware that in this phone conversation, I had slipped back into old habits and patterns of response and emotion. Our conversation was triggering me like a pack of firecrackers. She is, at the moment, inextricably … Continue reading →

Posted in fatigue, TRAVEL, change, Sociology, self-awareness, conflict, BOOKS, disillusionment, CHALLENGES & MISHAPS, memories, problem-solving, midlife crisis, self-respect, EMOTIONS, moving, exes, anxiety, conversation, Denver, Colorado, lesbians, Depressive Realism, anger, sacrifice, frustration, Supernatural Hypocrisy, Driving, Sensory Processing Sensitivity, betrayal, music, Aging, novelist, angst, HIGHLY SENSITIVE PERSON (HSP), sadness, depression, herniated disc, loneliness, SEXUALITY, disability, stress, injury, PSYCHOLOGY, Social Psychology, songwriter, life, triggers, HEALTH, RELIGION, writer, RELATIONSHIPS, Relocation, annoying people, The Cognitive Dissonance of a God Cosmology, harsh realities | 4 Replies

The Pusher

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on August 27, 2003 by Kelli Jae BaeliAugust 27, 2003

Certain people…why do they vex me so much? My most vexing personality type is the PUSHER. They suck the juice out of my brain and it is just so tired…. Recently, I had an unusually taxing experience with the Pusher…I had to keep reiterating that my response in a situation was about BRAIN FATIGUE…BRAIN FATIGUE…BRAIN FATIGUE…BRAIN FATIGUE…BRAIN FATIGUE! I wanted to get some some facts straight: I am not her My brain is not her brain My particular needs for balance and harmony are not hers. I was not angry that she spilled tea on my desk–I recognized that was … Continue reading →

Posted in pain, conflict, BRAIN, RELATIONSHIPS, fatigue | Tagged disagreement | Leave a reply

Quotes from Kelli Jae Baeli

....maybe your atheist friends feel frustrated and misunderstood by you, too. To me "religious" and "theist" are terms I consider pejorative, as do they, I surmise. There are plentiful and cogent reasons for that. There is religion, and then there is GOD--I am disgusted by both, even though GOD ceases to exist the second i reject RELIGION, as one cannot be divorced from the other, because GOD is a being invented by religious people who could not explain the world they lived in, and so manufactured an invisible being...nearly all religious thought stems from myth, (and the rest from human frailty) and myth stems from ignorance and delusion. Spirituality, in my view, is generally a coping mechanism for people who don't care for religion, per se. (And living staunchly in atheism can also cause depressive realism--when you see the world clearly as it really is, it can oppress the faint of heart.) Now, having said that, I have had and continue to have many experiences that might be called "spiritual", but I suspect it's for lack of better word. "There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy." I believe the Bard was right about that. But it doesn't mean it's about GOD, or religion. It's about those esoteric experiences for which we have no explanation---YET. I believe all things can eventually be explained in a rational way; that doesn't mean there aren't wonderfully mysterious things in this world. And the explanation for them does not detract from their value or wonder. Just because I can't explain them, doesn't mean I should default to "spirituality" or "religion" to give them meaning or veracity. For instance, the concepts of reincarnation and afterlife might be explained by membrane theory, and parallel universes...that's a scientific concept, but it would explain these sensations we have of knowing people before we know them, or having "memories" of other lives.... The bottom line, for me, is that religion has caused more harm, more suffering, and its tentacles reach into every aspect of what is broken in this world. And that is something I will never accept, and I will ALWAYS be angry about."

Politics Quotes

"People feel removed from sexism. 'I'm not a sexist, but I'm not a feminist.' They think there's this fuzzy middle ground. There's no fuzzy middle ground. You either believe that women are people or you don't. It's that simple." (Joss Whedon)

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Quotes for Writers

Really, in the end, the only thing that can make you a writer is the person that you are, the intensity of your feeling, the honesty of your vision, the unsentimental acknowledgment of the endless interest of the life around and within you. Virtually nobody can help you deliberately--many people will help you unintentionally. ~ Santha Rama Rau

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vociferousvo-SIF-er-us Crying out noisily, clamorous. Characterized by or uttered with vociferation.

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Orthodoxy means not thinking--not needing to think. Orthodoxy is unconsciousness.
~ George Orwell

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