Category Archives: herniated disc

Vamoosing

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on by

Suspended my Netflix account. Still packing, desperately needing boxes. Downstairs, I pulled up everything in that storage room, which was the contents brought so far from storage when I actually thought I was going to be living here permanently, and her mother had finally moved, so I could do that. But only after we had ripped up the carpet down there and cleaned the unbelievable nastiness her mother lived in. bleach fumes, up and down stairs, aching body. I realized I would have to leave some things behind because it wouldn’t fit in my car or in storage, and I … Continue reading →

Going to Denver Because You’re Dead (2)

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on by

In this second installment, I am on my way, the tone of the journey being set right away in Joplin, a mere 60 minutes from my starting place… Fri August 1 at 9:08am~ Jae:: in Joplin at loves truckstop. Having food and getting ice for my neck. It’s swelling. It’s tedious already driving 45mph I feel like I’m going to CO on horseback. Veep: but not bareback…..right? Jae: Yes, bareback, where all the trouble is to be found. First, i get back on the exit and take the wrong turn, winding up on an access road next to the interstate, … Continue reading →

On the Heels of…

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on by

  I had a marathon conversation last night with an ex from 10 years ago; and reconnected with her (Terra), via something she came across in my blog. The last half of the conversation created a feeling of great discomfort for me–both then, and this morning. My dreams were filled with people from the past, and anxiety tinted the start of my day. I was aware that in this phone conversation, I had slipped back into old habits and patterns of response and emotion. Our conversation was triggering me like a pack of firecrackers. She is, at the moment, inextricably … Continue reading →

News from the Front Lines

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on by

Four of my books are live on Amazon and four more will be, by next week, probably. Then another five will follow within a month. Then I can start working on the books I’ve had to put on the back burner to do all those final edits. I’ve also gotten out of my groove with the writing because of everything else that required my full attention. I’m anxious to get back to it. It’s such a part of me, that when I don’t write, I start to feel a little empty. Am on schedule for my relocation to Colorado. My … Continue reading →

Herniated Disco: Necessary Scissors

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on by

“It’s hard to separate our feelings of obligation from our own healthy choices…bottom line, people do what they do. If they don’t want to do it, they won’t. If they did it with strings attached, they shouldn’t be surprised when someone has scissors, and knows how to use them.” The above quote is one of my own, and appropriate for this post. The scissors necessary in this case have to do with a certain friend who has let me down one too many times. I have high standards for the people I consider my close friends, but i also know … Continue reading →

Herniated Disco: How the Bleep Do YOU Know?

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on by

Have been using affirmations lately, trying to have some control over my healing instead of feeling so victimized…been chanting those when i go for walks…and been watching my thoughts and trying to be positive. My Netflix came yesterday with “What the Bleep Do We Know?” –I’ve seen it before, but am revisiting all kinds of ideas, hoping to find help…I watched it last night and want to watch again today. Trying to be open to anything that might help me heal from this, and from the emotional damage I’ve had for a while now…decided I should give the ‘thoughts are … Continue reading →

Herniated Disco: Motivations & Ruminations

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on by

Tried to stay positive today but had a hard time. A long-time fear which has simmered on the back burner for some time, is now moving toward the front burner. I was thinking about what it might mean…this situation…I intend to do wholeheartedly, start to finish, the steps outlined in the book by Dr. Daulton, when I have all the “ingredients” in place, but if the methods don’t ultimately heal me, then what? I had this sort of sick feeling every time I thought about surgery. I don’t know if it’s just my inherent fear of surgery, in and of … Continue reading →

Herniated Disco: Lies & the Lying Doctors Who Tell Them

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on by

I am on new meds and using neck brace and neck pillow and things are doing better. I also just discovered yesterday that the neurology doc LIED to me. I’m about to go after him through certain other channels at the VA. But he told me surgery was my only option and didn’t even mention other treatments. I have since found those resources and am pretty pissed that he just decided to tell me that surgery was best for me–he has a responsibility to tell me ALL my options. I was being railroaded. Now I’ve got up to 6 months … Continue reading →