Category Archives: HOLIDAYS & OCCASIONS

Day of the Turkeys (with one exceptional squirrel)

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For our first wedding anniversary, Melissa and I went to Onyx cave in Eureka Springs. Heading out, we were, as usual, watching for good pictures, our cameras at the ready, as I steered the Avalanche (whom we lovingly call Ava Lanche, as in French style Launch-SHAY. She is like another one of our pets.) Just down the road on Highway 23, we stopped to take photos of a tree full of turkey vultures. Creepy and wonderful. This was balanced by a precious little bluebird Melissa captured nearby. But not a turkey bluebird. We were starving, but thought we’d just stop … Continue reading →

The First Thanksgiving It didn't happen that way.

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    As we celebrate Thanksgiving, let’s remember that the holiday is based on a lie, and to celebrate it differently. Be thankful for our gifts and blessings, but never forget the true history. Let’s keep the atrocities happening now at Standing Rock in mind. Let’s also remember that unless we are full-blooded Native American, we ARE ALL IMMIGRANTS. The First Thanksgiving It Didn’t Happen That Way Let me begin by stating that thousands of years before the ‘official’ Thanksgiving Day was proclaimed by Governor Winthrop of the Massachusetts Bay Colony in 1637, North American Indigenous people across the continent … Continue reading →

Charcoal Thursday Sale

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I had stretched my budget to the limit at the end of this month, and wasn’t sure when my check would go in, but assumed I’d be spending Thanksgiving eating an avocado pocket sandwich, rather than something with turkey in it, to at least commemorate the holiday. But then, my check went in early, and I thought. “Hey, I should go buy some kind of turkey dinner now.” Well. It was a holiday, and I knew many things would be closed. I just hoped at least one of the grocery stores would be open. So I got in my van … Continue reading →

Happy Thanksgivoween

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NOTE: I typed in Thanksgivoween, as the title of this blog, while thumbing it into my iPhone…and the autocorrect made it Thank Gully Nig (sounds like a good title- who’s Gully Nig?–I’m sure I’ll come up with a story for that). So–Today I am thankful that I finally found the love of my life even though we can’t be together right now. I am thankful that I have a nice vehicle to provide autonomy and comfort, and a reasonably comfortable place to live, even though it’s just a lonely hotel and nothing more. I am thankful that I am able to … Continue reading →

Belated & Premature Well-Wishing

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  This morning, I woke–still groggy from my trip to Ellaville–and had to fend off a Kissy-Monster. It was terrible. I can’t really talk about it. But my beloved had put a card and a little velvet pouch on the pillow next to me. A little gold bracelet and a sweet card. Valentine’s day is not a big deal here…yet, she had not ignored it…she is sneaky that way.  I had decided to ignore the event, so it wouldn’t make her feel guilty for not acknowledging it. Now I’m the one who feels guilty that I didn’t go ahead and … Continue reading →

No More Hall-Decking for You Guys

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“Twelve Jews were brutally murdered, huge numbers maimed, and many Jewish women were raped. Two million rubles worth  of property was destroyed.” ~ Lawrence Kelleman I sn’t Christmas a wonderful time of year? Consider this:      Thus says the LORD, Do not learn the way of the nations, And do not be terrified by the signs of the Heavens, although the nations are terrified by them; For the customs of the peoples are delusion; Because it is wood cut from the forest, The work of the hands of a craftsman with a cutting tool. They decorate it with silver and with gold; They fasten it … Continue reading →

Hanging the Moon and Lesbian Monikers

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I placed another personal ad on Craigslist. Hopefully this won’t turn into a freak-fest like it did last time. And if it does, well, more material for my writing. LOL. The Ad I used before was way more humorous, but I was afraid it might be overwhelming and make ME look a little crazy. Who knows? Here’s the one I used before: Only seek LOCAL friends & dates. Please & thank you. LDR’s are usually doomed from the start. It’s like being pecked to death by chickens. So not big on them unless you can afford to travel to date … Continue reading →

Happy Effing Anniversary

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Today would have been our one year anniversary. D. came by at 9:30 with police escort to get some things. Officers were very nice. He said “Kelli?” I said, “Yes, but I go by Jae.” He introduced himself but now I can’t remember his name. I shook his hand in introduction. He said the lady over there needed.…and then I couldn’t hear what he was saying because when I looked across the street, there she was, parked in her truck. I had a little palpitation and felt myself step backward.They stepped in and I explained that I only had to … Continue reading →

What I’m Getting Myself for Xmas.

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When I was in college during the early part of the 90’s, (my second foray into academia) I had to do one of those presentations for speech in which your group invents a product and then does the sales pitch to the class. I ended up with a bunch of dead beats in my group who didn’t want to work on it because they had a party to get to, beer to drink, etc. Most people who’ve been to college, know that drill…. So–I did most of the work. I came up with a product called “Life Light” which was … Continue reading →

No More Hall-Decking for You Guys

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Jeremiah 10:2-4: “Thus saith the LORD, Learn not the way of the heathen, and be not dismayed at the signs of heaven; for the heathen are dismayed at them. For the customs of the people are vain: for one cutteth a tree out of the forest, the work of the hands of the workman, with the axe. They deck it with silver and with gold; they fasten it with nails and with hammers, that it move not.” (KJV). Okay, that’s it for all you Christmas tree-hugging Christians. If you believe in what the Bible tells you, there will be no … Continue reading →

The First Idiot & His Right-Hand Dick

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The First Idiot is once again revising the reasons for going to war. Now, it seems it is about Osama Bin Laden again and the economy. Funny, in an interview with Anne Curry on February 18th, Bush said, “I dont think so. I think actually the spending in the war might help with jobsbecause were buying equipment, and people are working. I think this economy is down because we built too many houses and the economys adjusting.” At any given time in the past, Idiot-extraordinaire Dubya said the war was about oh-so-many things–according to what his pea-brain thought would fly. … Continue reading →

Birthday Blows

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(I wrote this on my birthday, yesterday, but didn’t get it posted in time, as i was busy writing other posts and trying to get that random-text JavaScript to work. I welcome any JavaScript Gurus who might be able to tell me how to fix it. But here is the post, belated, as birthday recognition seems always to be): I woke to the sound of leaf blowers, realizing March Madness, for me, isn’t a basketball tournament, but a month signifying the beginning of the Condo Association’s launch into landscaping and general outside maintenance. So, the first leaf blowers have arrived. … Continue reading →

My Birthday Legacy Rumination

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Today is my birthday. I’ll be 44. (yes, i will! shut up!). And since today is my birthday, I thought I’d do the obligatory ruminations. Who, what, where, when, and why…and how.WHO: My big three identity markers are, Author, Artist, Singer-Songwriter. I’m also an avid blogger, a therapeutic touchist, a webmaster, an armchair philosopher, and….I like cheese. WHAT: Fiction and non-fiction–I have 12 books in print with about 5 more available (I hope) by the end of this year. I like to paint, and do sculpture and pottery. I record CD’s of my original music in my paltry home-studio, and … Continue reading →

Fur-Family Christmas

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The Cast of characters: Giz (AKA Gizmo, Gizzard the Lizard, Gizzy-Giz, and of course, his Russian name, Gizimov Runninov). Adopted from shelter in 1998. Half spaniel, half chihuahua, and all the way sweet and nerdy. If he was a human he’d be in therapy and wear pocket protectors.He eats anything i give him and steals the rest. Nanny (AKA the Nanster, Snooder, Smacker, Nanner-Bananner). Poodle adopted from the shelter. Stone deaf, incontinent, toothless. Eats only soft food, wears a diaper and makes “hoo hoo” noises.     Stormy (AKA the Stormster, the Storminator, Stormy-storm). Matriarch of the LS branch of … Continue reading →