Category Archives: Behavior

Is it Goodreads or Badreaders? Mean-spirited behavior is a learned behavior. It can be unlearned.

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I’ve always believed that every ill in our society falls under one or more of three categories: Greed, Ignorance or Zealotry. I was faced with an example of one or more of these while updating my author page on Goodreads. I came across a negative review, quite by accident, of one of my earlier books. Against my better judgment, I read it, and was horrified. The reviewer, obviously, did not like my book, and that’s fine, in and of itself, but this reviewer made statements that were patently false. She claimed the character in my book was “helping a pedophile.” … Continue reading →

Being a Delicate Organism A Peek into the daily life of an HSP

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Highly Sensitive People are, as the moniker suggests, acutely aware of stimuli. Which is one reason I prefer the designation of Highly Aware Person. HAP. I’m a Hap. A Happy. Sounds much better to me than being called “Highly Sensitive” which carries with it a rather pejorative tint. But HSP is the most commonly used acronym in reference to us, and so I feel a bit obligated to use it. HSPs are often aware of sensory input that others miss. We are about 20% of the population, and this Sensory Processing Sensitivity is found in around 100 other species, as … Continue reading →

The Fourth Betrayal

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NOTE: So, in my seeking help when i needed it, for my recent betrayals and abandonments, the counselor i went to see called the next day to inform me she couldn’t see me anymore and for a really stupid reason. I tried to reason with her on the phone, but she had to stand by what she felt was her principals, but which was only LOFTY IDEAS getting in the way of her ability to give the actual care she had sworn to as a medical professional. Finally frustrated beyond words and feeling even worse, i hung up on her. … Continue reading →

Space Invader

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[Blast from the past–from April 8, 2004] It started out with me on my way to the grocery store, having awakened with no coffee in the house-a tragedy all on its own. I thought of that little coffeeshop down the street and thought maybe I’d stop in to check it out, so I brought what i lovingly refer to as my Tippi Tap Typer just in case. Roscoe’s Music and Espresso Cafe was a tiny establishment, but intriguing. It was time I tried to get out of the house a little and use my new toy in a different environment. … Continue reading →

Letter to a Battered Heart

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Open letter to a friend whose heart is battered…. I remember that you were there for me when I was going through a lot and had no one. So I will do my best to be here for you, now. In this life, you have to separate your mental and emotional things, your habits, your beliefs–like laundry. Whites over there, colors over there, delicates there. You can’t throw them all in together or the colors will bleed and what was once pure and white is now sullied. Some things must be kept apart, some things put together, and you always … Continue reading →

If a Woodchuck Could Chuck YOU.

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Was meeting a friend at a local pub I like a lot, even though it’s often noisy as hell, and I picked out a booth to wait for my friend to arrive. The waitress gave me a glare when I sat down at the table that still had the paid ticket and the dirty dishes. I had never had a rude waitress there, so gave her the benefit of the doubt. Maybe she wasn’t looking at me. Then it took her a full five minutes to get over there and clean the table off, and I wondered. When I tried … Continue reading →

Book Review: Valencia

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One of the reasons I began writing lesbian fiction 25 years ago, was because I could not, at that time, find a kindred spirit in them. I could not relate to those characters, and their lives. The women in the pages of the lesbian fiction I read back then did not represent me, nor anyone I knew, or wanted to know. This offended me greatly. As for the book, Valencia, itself, the author does have some writing talent and I did notice a periodic turn of a phrase or insightful comment, but overall, these positives were overshadowed by everything else. … Continue reading →

Shamelessly Stolen Meme Survey

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Your ex calls wanting to hangout, what do you say? By ex, I will assume you mean, ones I had a relationship with for longer than a year. Depends on who it is. Although, I have to say there are few with whom i would like to hang out…maybe the first one, but don’t see her calling after all these years…I quite thoroughly broke her heart…but i would hang out with her if she did call….and the 4th one…the one who started as girlfriend, and wound up being my best friend. What do you think about sex before marriage? This … Continue reading →

Turn, Turn, Turn

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{reposted from Facebook} I just had a really unsettling experience. I’m trying right now to just calm my thumping heart, and take a breath. One thing that is no secret about me, is that I don’t have many secrets. I am pretty open. I have to be, because I am a creative person who produces creative material. But I don’t pretend that I’m so special that i don’t have a day to day life with day to day struggles and victories that i wish to share with those in my life. Nor do I pretend that human nature is always … Continue reading →

I Warned You About Protective Head Cover.

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In response to a recent blog, (Ditto) a friend of mine mentioned that maybe the person I wrote about would not ever try to communicate with me about the situation, for fear it might end up in another blog. But I only write about people that way if they have been moved to the negative column, so her argument dissolves at the start. Had this person accepted the many opportunities to communicate with me, the blog would not have been written. She chose not to. As I said in that blog: “There’s an upside to this vocation that offers some … Continue reading →

Ditto

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The word “Ditto” means another of the same, a duplicate, a copy. What I have been experiencing here, with people, is ditto. Just when I might feel my faith in people resurrecting, a little ditto happens and that faith is relegated to ashes again. Is everyone a ditto? I can’t possibly be the only one who feels this way, so why can’t I ever find those people? And why can’t one of them be my partner so that I can stop stumbling over the corpses of my own discontent? Writing can be solitary, and writing can be thankless. Real writers … Continue reading →

I Don’t Keep Hoardly Anything

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….Looking at the Hoard Mentality Every so often, when I’m doing Spring cleaning, or having guests over I want to impress, I look around and think: Hark! I might be mental. I think I’m a hoarder. I’m reorganizing and cleaning, and everywhere I have things that need a place to go, and then I ask myself, why do I have so many things? I know it is my lack mentality. I did without, and was always broke my whole life, and so now it’s a habit to hang onto things just in case. Every time I had let go of … Continue reading →

Organic Doesn’t Mean Clueless

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This will illustrate, i hope, the power of dialogue. Even with no story, you can glean all the information you need from what two people are saying to each other. I used to go sit in public places like restaurants and coffee shops and just dictate what i was hearing into my AlphaSmart. This is a real conversation i had on the phone with a friend… “I really wanted this to be organic this time. I didn’t want to force it. But I can’t figure out where her head is, I just know that i dont’ like how she’s treating … Continue reading →

Specious Nonsense: Dobbs on the Dot Again

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Lou Dobbs is one of my favorite journalists, (along with Keith Olbermann) because he speaks the truth…the stories he covers are not the usual fare, but are at once indicative of how the mainstream media misses the most important stories–the ones that really matter. If i have to watch another 30 minute segment on Brittany Spears, i think I’m going to claw my own eyes out. When did some wayward pop star become newsworthy? How is the state of her psyche more important than the slew of other things going on that we, as citizens, need to know about? To … Continue reading →

Sullied Pajamas-the thlot plickens (3 0f 5)

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Last night i received a mysterious email. hello…. you might want to ask SP about her suicide attempt in Jan., it is public record as the sheriff was involved. an unstable woman who will emotionally attach to you and never let you go…… just a heads up from one who knows. Awfully hard to let that one go. I wrote back: . Oh my God. That never came up in our conversations. Can I ask who you are and how you know? Have we met? I would appreciate talking with you about this, if you will allow me. ———————————————– She … Continue reading →