Category Archives: memories

Singing, Snoring & Joy

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Something happened to me. I was applying formatting to print file for one of my books, feeling the dessicated adrenal supplement coursing through my veins, and i was singing along to Shawn Colvin on “Get out of this house”, formatting, and feeling pretty damn good…and then i just started crying…not from sadness. It was a sensation I hadn’t felt in such a long time…one I can only describe as the elusive feeling of pure JOY. It made me want to perform again, write songs again. Buy a guitar to use until i could get mine from storage…I could barely sing … Continue reading →

Plaque Brain

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I often have trouble remembering my dreams, even though i wish fervently that this was not so. Dreams are an incredible resource for a creative person, and this NO ACCESS thing makes me think that the Powers That Be are protecting me from some screaming ugly… At any rate, when i do recall a dream, i like to write it down…if it’s interesting… so… I was having exploratory brain surgery. Skull open, i had a metal halo contraption around my head. Two of the docs were in there–or orderlies, maybe…they were acting crazy, looking at my exposed gray matter. One … Continue reading →

Alien Tummy Tuck

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Just checking my hair. No apparent reason, just throwing a passing glance in the mirror on my way to turn on the shower, and saw some little blemish on my face. Closer inspection revealed nothing of consequence. But then i looked closer in the looking glass…(Alice never had a trip like that through the looking glass) closer…until i could see the pores on my skin, touch the bags under my eyes and saw how loose the skin was….my skin had become loose somewhere along the way. Not the skin of my 20’s,or even 30’s, but the skin of someone growing … Continue reading →

Kindred Molecules, Deja Vu, and Noosphere

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There are people we meet who seem to be immediately familiar…these familiars are somewhat vexing, in that it often doesn’t make much sense why you are drawn to certain people and feel like they are part of your molecules, somehow.Whatever that little cosmic thing is that seems to be going on somewhere under the radar…I seriously believe in the concept of Kindreds. I rarely have that sense with people, but I have been enjoying that connection with a new one–Tanya. I feel a connection with Tanya that defies logic. We haven’t seen each other in 30 years. But I have … Continue reading →

Stored Memory

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Yesterday, i went to Colorado Springs to start dealing with the storage i have there. It’s been percolating there for 7 years. Odd, how so much of it i didn’t even recall having. Not that i remembered after i saw it–i mean, i saw it and still didn’t remember having it.Weirdness. The first surprise was when i opened the door. For those of you my age and older, you might think “Fibber McGee’s closet…” For the rest of you, I’m not sure what analogy you’d think of. But i needed a heavy duty shoehorn to start getting that stuff out. … Continue reading →

Stored Memories & Domestic Trivia

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Yesterday, i went to Colorado Springs to start dealing with the storage i have there. It’s been percolating for 7 years. Odd, how so much of it i didn’t even recall having. Not that i remembered after i saw it–i mean, i saw it and still didn’t remember having it.Weirdness. The first surprise was when i opened the door. For those of you my age and older, you might think “Fibber McGee’s closet…” For the rest of you, I’m not sure what analogy you’d think of. But i needed a heavy duty shoehorn to start getting that stuff out. The … Continue reading →

On the Heels of…

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  I had a marathon conversation last night with an ex from 10 years ago; and reconnected with her (Terra), via something she came across in my blog. The last half of the conversation created a feeling of great discomfort for me–both then, and this morning. My dreams were filled with people from the past, and anxiety tinted the start of my day. I was aware that in this phone conversation, I had slipped back into old habits and patterns of response and emotion. Our conversation was triggering me like a pack of firecrackers. She is, at the moment, inextricably … Continue reading →

Love Archetype

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I had five dreams about her again last night. I wasn’t thinking about her when i went to sleep, nor the whole day before. But again, i dream about her. too often. And it’s always the same. She is in some way being nice to me. The dreams always feel so good. So why am i complaining? well, because it’s a dream and not real. I never did get that closure with her. She never was nice to me. It’s complicated also by the fact that in all these dreams, the “nice:” gets mixed in with the romantic, and she … Continue reading →