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Home→Categories PSYCHOLOGY→Social anxiety

Category Archives: Social anxiety

Furiously Happy:
My brain hungered for humor. Was absolutely famished for fun.

Posted on August 24, 2020 by Kelli Jae BaeliSeptember 11, 2020

I am very picky about the books I read, and it’s hard to find anything that doesn’t either piss me off or bore me. That might just be a product of having been an Indie Author, honing her craft for 30 years, or maybe it’s just me being too damn critical. But I never had problems in my younger years. Like say, my twenties and before. But then, I didn’t write my first book until I was 26. So maybe it really is that being an author affects my ability to enjoy reading other authors that aren’t top-notch. Garbage in, … Continue reading →

Posted in depression, stress, WRITING CRAFT, distraction, happiness, desperation, Social anxiety, writer, harsh realities, mental illness, self-awareness, novelist, BOOKS, WRITING LIFE, anxiety, despair, Depressive Realism, sensitivity, Social Psychology, ENTERTAINMENT, reality, memoir genre, CURRENT AFFAIRS, coping skills, Humor genre, Book review, Jenny Lawson, Furiously Happy, Lets Pretend This Never Happened, reading | Leave a reply

No Such Thing As a Protest Vote:
In which I dare to question a non-voting professor

Posted on August 15, 2020 by Kelli Jae BaeliSeptember 20, 2020

I don’t know about you, but I’m tired of being a snowflake. It’s well and truly time for Democrats to stop whining and being precious, and Board the Blue Choo Choo. We have many changes to make, and by now, we should all agree that those changes will never be made with a corrupted party in charge. My skin may not be black, but I know what it’s like to be a minority, and to be punished for it. I’m an Indie author. A disabled veteran. I’m not just a woman, but a gay woman, married to a woman. I’m … Continue reading →

Posted in Hillary Clinton, elections, responsibility, voting, society, Social anxiety, Kelli Jae Baeli, harsh realities, conversations, Twitter, Social Psychology, CURRENT AFFAIRS, ARTICLES & ESSAYS, racism, political parties, debate, sexism | Tagged voting | 2 Replies

Heavy Cream

Posted on November 12, 2016 by Kelli Jae BaeliAugust 5, 2017

Says right there, it’s heavy. And yet it rises to the top. There are heavy hearts. Heavy minds. But it says right there it’s heavy and yet it rises to the top. Be the cream, my people.  Be. The. Cream. #bethecream Save

Continue reading →
Posted in Social anxiety, Social Psychology, coping skills | Leave a reply

Giving it Away: Spoilers as Both Noun & Accusation

Posted on March 12, 2013 by Kelli Jae BaeliMarch 19, 2013

Directly out of the chute, let me say this is coming from myself as both a writer and a reader. One compelling reason (among others) that I became an author, was due to my disappointment in the offerings of a certain genre. I wanted to write books *I* would want to read. I launched myself into this vocation with little knowledge of what that decision would bring. I had no way of knowing the degree of vulnerability that publishing my writing would entail. Publishing a book is very much like being naked in public. So it’s difficult not to take … Continue reading →

Posted in WRITING CRAFT, PSYCHOLOGY, annoying people, responsibility, AUTHORS, novels, society, Social anxiety, writer, RESOURCE & REFERENCE, novelist, BOOKS, Fiction, Book Reviews, WRITING LIFE, sensitivity, Writing tips, WRITING, reading, Social Psychology, ENTERTAINMENT, novellas, critics, Sociology, CHALLENGES & MISHAPS, EMOTIONS, VOCATIONS, spoilers | 12 Replies

Why not Me?

Posted on December 20, 2011 by Kelli Jae BaeliAugust 30, 2013

Pulitzer and Nobel Prize-winning author, Pearl S. Buck  said, “A human creature born abnormally, inhumanely sensitive. To them… a touch is a blow, a sound is a noise, a misfortune is a tragedy, a joy is an ecstasy, a friend is a lover, a lover is a god, and failure is death. Add to this cruelly delicate organism the overpowering necessity to create, create, create~ so that without the creating of music or poetry or books or buildings or something of meaning, their very breath is cut off…They must create, must pour out creation. By some strange, unknown, inward urgency … Continue reading →

Posted in frustration, depression, stress, life, RELATIONSHIPS, Driving, meaning, fear, romance, friendship, angst, chaos, CREATIVITY, loneliness, desperation, PSYCHOLOGY, disillusionment, AUTHORS, anger, Social anxiety, sadness, harsh realities, self-awareness, socializing, anxiety, despair, Depressive Realism, Sensory Processing Sensitivity, sensitivity | Tagged introversion, Dr. Elaine Aron, PhD | Leave a reply

Letter to a Battered Heart

Posted on November 29, 2011 by Kelli Jae BaeliMarch 5, 2013

Open letter to a friend whose heart is battered…. I remember that you were there for me when I was going through a lot and had no one. So I will do my best to be here for you, now. In this life, you have to separate your mental and emotional things, your habits, your beliefs–like laundry. Whites over there, colors over there, delicates there. You can’t throw them all in together or the colors will bleed and what was once pure and white is now sullied. Some things must be kept apart, some things put together, and you always … Continue reading →

Posted in frustration, depression, dating, stress, life, RELATIONSHIPS, conflict, Behavior, exes, experience, lesbians, Human Nature, truth, guilt, women, happiness, meaning, fear, romance, love, friendship, growth, angst, loneliness, desperation, PSYCHOLOGY, lies, disillusionment, self-respect, anger, betrayal, Social anxiety, sadness, hope, Kelli Jae Baeli, honesty, girlfriends, harsh realities, communication, self-awareness, reason, grief, socializing, anxiety, despair, intimacy, sensitivity, SEXUALITY, Social Psychology, ENTERTAINMENT, PHILOSOPHY, reality, CHALLENGES & MISHAPS, EMOTIONS, courage, celibacy, music, Jonatha Brooke | Leave a reply

Positive Anchoring, Honesty & Humor

Posted on November 22, 2011 by Kelli Jae BaeliMarch 11, 2013

Sometimes we have to come up with clever solutions to problems. Three of my most cherished and successful coping skills have been Positive Anchoring, honesty and humor. One of the situations that is particularly challenging is being nervous in social situations. For an HSP, it’s doubly hard and it happens far more often. We often find ourselves overwhelmed by that date we have with someone we’re attracted to. We can spoil an entire evening with the handwringing and insecure self-talk going on in our heads. We can spill our drinks, say something insipid or insulting, or just panic, make up … Continue reading →

Posted in RELATIONSHIPS, quirks, PSYCHOLOGY, DRUGS, Social anxiety, honesty, self-awareness, anxiety, Sensory Processing Sensitivity, HIGHLY SENSITIVE PERSON (HSP), sensitivity, panic, Xanax, Social Psychology, PHILOSOPHY, EMOTIONS, coping skills | Tagged performance anxiety, Positive Anchoring, dry erase board, performing, insecurity | 2 Replies

Hanging the Moon and Lesbian Monikers

Posted on November 3, 2011 by Kelli Jae BaeliMarch 5, 2013

I placed another personal ad on Craigslist. Hopefully this won’t turn into a freak-fest like it did last time. And if it does, well, more material for my writing. LOL. The Ad I used before was way more humorous, but I was afraid it might be overwhelming and make ME look a little crazy. Who knows? Here’s the one I used before: Only seek LOCAL friends & dates. Please & thank you. LDR’s are usually doomed from the start. It’s like being pecked to death by chickens. So not big on them unless you can afford to travel to date … Continue reading →

Posted in HUMOR, dating, life, sex, RELATIONSHIPS, lesbians, women, Internet Dating, angst, loneliness, desperation, PSYCHOLOGY, disillusionment, Social anxiety, sadness, honesty, harsh realities, gender-confusion, ISO (In Search Of), socializing, Book Excerpt, BOOKS, midlife crisis, anxiety, lipstick lesbians, gender-identity, SEXUALITY, Social Psychology, PHILOSOPHY, Sociology, Valentine's Day, nonfiction, CHALLENGES & MISHAPS, EMOTIONS, personal ads | Tagged femepicene, chapstick lesbians, craigslist | 6 Replies

Id, Ego, Super-Ego & the Social Security Number

Posted on November 7, 2009 by Kelli Jae BaeliDecember 10, 2011

I slept fitfully all night. A pervasive anxiety crept through me until I began to fidget with restless legs. A couple of times I woke up feeling like I couldn’t breathe. Like I was underwater and there was no surface in either direction. I didn’t know if I was up or down….I only knew I was going to drown. (Song Lyric alert).Lest anyone think me too self-possessed, I will admit that what tossed me and turned me was not the plotting problems of my newest novel, but plain old insecurity. I went to sleep thinking about the phone conversation I … Continue reading →

Posted in dating, open relationships, PSYCHOLOGY, Social anxiety, ego | Tagged idiot, Freud | Leave a reply

Making Tracks

Posted on August 8, 2009 by Kelli Jae BaeliMarch 5, 2013

So my first First Fridays at Tracks. I went, faithfully following my GPS, and watching the little pulsing blue dot that was me on the map, as I veered repeatedly from the route I was supposed to take. I’ve discovered that if I just drive straight shots through town, I do better. The Highway is confusing and I end up taking the wrong lane and having to circle back and start over. Later I ran into Tina and her friend and spent a little time with them. Everyone wanted to steal my electronic cigarette. I must get some stock to … Continue reading →

Posted in Aging, HUMOR, dating, life, RELATIONSHIPS, lesbians, Driving, friendship, loneliness, PSYCHOLOGY, change, disillusionment, society, Social anxiety, harsh realities, moving, Colorado, socializing, awkwardness, midlife crisis, anxiety, Lakewood, SEXUALITY, Social Psychology, Sociology, CHALLENGES & MISHAPS, EMOTIONS, Denver | Tagged nightclub | 1 Reply

Whining Pariah

Posted on October 20, 2008 by Kelli Jae BaeliMarch 10, 2013

Colorado…….I’m sure there are kindreds out there (I do have a fabulous best friend, 2 hrs away, but i mean OTHERS). I am so anxious to meet all the people in the social groups I’ve joined online already. The degree to which I want this move is palpable; I can think of little else, and my level of stress reflects my fear that it might be delayed, or–unimaginably–not possible at all. Here, where I am, I always feel like a stranger in a strange land. I feel like the pariah. (Don’t forget, this is the Bible-Belt). I feel like most … Continue reading →

Posted in frustration, RELATIONSHIPS, lesbians, Internet Dating, angst, loneliness, desperation, PSYCHOLOGY, disillusionment, society, Social anxiety, sadness, harsh realities, moving, Colorado, pariah, Relocation, singlehood, midlife crisis, anxiety, identity, Depressive Realism, SEXUALITY, risk, RELIGION, Sociology, CHALLENGES & MISHAPS, EMOTIONS, boredom, GEOGRAPHY | Leave a reply

Brain Dump: Mortality & Meaning

Posted on March 25, 2008 by Kelli Jae BaeliMarch 10, 2013

Okay, I know this is going to be less a blog, and more a journal entry, but whatever. Consider it the first in a series of brain dumps. <<–Look, i even made a graphic for it…. Onward…. I usually try to see the bright side of things, and when I can’t do that, I try to see the funny side. Anyone who reads this blog knows that. And often the dark side can be funny, if you know how to manipulate the data. But this morning, I think my brain is in some other gear….PARK, maybe. It hits me like … Continue reading →

Posted in frustration, Aging, aggravation, life, RELATIONSHIPS, quirks, exes, family, guilt, meaning, fear, growth, angst, loneliness, desperation, PSYCHOLOGY, HEALTH, existence, disillusionment, anger, betrayal, Social anxiety, Shoes, sadness, purpose, mortality, cigarettes, harsh realities, self-awareness, grief, luck, triggers, singlehood, midlife crisis, anxiety, despair, Depressive Realism, Sensory Processing Sensitivity, HIGHLY SENSITIVE PERSON (HSP), sensitivity, PHILOSOPHY, reality, BRAIN, Sociology, cats, CHALLENGES & MISHAPS, EMOTIONS | Tagged brain dump, parrot, E Pluribus Unum | Leave a reply

Catching Hell From the Hellish

Posted on March 24, 2008 by Kelli Jae BaeliMarch 5, 2013

Even within my own “supposed” community, the community assigned to me by virtue of my sexual preference, I catch hell in the online dating realm, whenever I complain about the content of insipid emails from the dull and ignorant on personals sites. Misspelled words, fragmented sentences, fake modesty, transparent bravado, shallow beliefs, misplaced haughtiness, gender confusion, the walking wounded…. Sometimes I can’t believe it. Unfortunately, I have no choice but to believe it, because it’s true. It happens to me repeatedly, like some recurring rash… I continue to get those kinds of mails. I even started a special forum called … Continue reading →

Posted in frustration, dating, life, Hell, RELATIONSHIPS, quirks, lesbians, Human Nature, Internet Dating, angst, Internet, PSYCHOLOGY, annoying people, disillusionment, society, Social anxiety, harsh realities, self-awareness, socializing, identity, PHILOSOPHY, reality, Sociology, EMOTIONS, personal ads, boredom | 1 Reply

Mental Biscuit

Posted on February 16, 2008 by Kelli Jae BaeliFebruary 16, 2008

After spending a good 16 hours in my basement office, my feet were stinging cold. When I climbed into bed to continue reading my John Varley novel, I kept being distracted by two things—my feet, of course, and my cat, Biscuit. I solved the feet problem by nuking one of those gel packs. My feet were then warming up under the covers, but Biscuit was still doing her best to let me know she knew it was bedtime, and that’s when she begins her rituals. First, it’s blocking my path and mewing, and slithering in and out of my ankles. … Continue reading →

Posted in HUMOR, PSYCHOLOGY, Biscuit, Social anxiety, animals, cats | Tagged OCD, rituals, BPD | Leave a reply

Quotes from Kelli Jae Baeli

"That's about as much fun as inflamed hemorrhoidal tissues. But not quite as much fun as trying to spell hemorrhoidal."

Politics Quotes

"People feel removed from sexism. 'I'm not a sexist, but I'm not a feminist.' They think there's this fuzzy middle ground. There's no fuzzy middle ground. You either believe that women are people or you don't. It's that simple." (Joss Whedon)

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NickKnudsenUSNick Knudsen 🇺🇸@NickKnudsenUS·

15h

Reminder: On November 1, 2022 there are 20 GOP Senate seats up for grabs. Let's leave it all on the field. #DemCast

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27 Jan

I was really wrong about Biden before the SC primary. His cabinet picks, policy positions, public statements and decisive actions grounded in justice and equity over the first 6 days of his presidency prove that he means business and is clearly the right leader for these times.

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9h

who made this

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9h

Cloris Leachman has died, she was 94 and a remarkable talent who never failed to make me laugh.

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Retweet on TwitterKelli Jae Baeli©BestsellingGenreHoppingIndieAuthor Retweeted
phidippides26John McAndrew@phidippides26·

9h

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Are you all aware that the Department of Homeland Security (@DHSgov) issued a warning on Wednesday about domestic terror between now and the end of April?

Well, they did.

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