↓
 

Slider
  • Home
  • Author Bio
  • About My Blogs
  • Apocalyptic Women Series
    • All Bets Are Off
    • Juvie: True North
  • AKA Investigations series
    • Also Known as Armchair Detective
    • Also Known as DNA
    • Also Known as Syzygy (AKA Investigations #3)
    • Also Known as Rising & Falling (AKA Investigations #4)
    • Also Known as Sleepy Cat Peak
    • Also Known as Blue, Dark & Bright (AKA Investigations #6)
    • AKA Investigations series
  • Rain Falls series
    • Rain Falls (Rain Falls #1)
    • In Absentia (Rain Falls #2)
    • Pariahs & Prodigals (Rain Falls #3)
    • Rain Falls series
  • New Harbor Witches series
    • Keepers
    • Ravens
    • New Harbor Witches series
  • Minocqua Trilogy
    • Throwing Caution (Minocqua Trilogy #1)
    • Building Character (Minocqua Trilogy #2)
  • Cross-Pollination series
    • Pooly Fall (Cross-Pollination#1)
  • Samegender Chronicles
    • Sister Resister
  • StandAlones
    • Duct Tape & a Tarp
    • The Girls in the Band
    • Go. Leave. Stay.
    • Run the Risk
    • Pitfall
    • Another Justice
    • Baggage
    • Achilles Forjan
    • Plethora
    • As You Were
  • Novellas
    • Sister Resister
    • Saturation Point
    • Building Character (Minocqua Trilogy #2)
    • Throwing Caution (Minocqua Trilogy #1)
    • Somewhere Else
    • Random Acts of Blindness
    • Curse of Cache La Poudre
    • Quintessence
    • Powerful Things
  • Speculative Fiction
    • Sister Resister
    • Pitfall
    • Keepers
    • Ravens
    • Quintessence
    • Powerful Things
    • Somewhere Else
    • Elsewhere Box set
    • The Ghost & Captain Kirk
  • Anthologies
    • Nerve (Selected & Neglected Poetry)
    • Face Down in the Low Road
    • Diction Deja Vu
    • The Truth of Fiction
    • Literary Loitering
    • The Speed of Dark
    • Bettered by a Dead Crustacean
    • Immortality or Something Like it
    • Too Much World
    • Sullied Pajamas
    • Wear a Helmet
    • Crossing Paths
    • Brainmatter
    • Strictly Academic
  • Nonfiction
    • Essays
    • Face Down in the Low Road
    • Diction Deja Vu
    • The Truth of Fiction
    • Literary Loitering
    • Bettered by a Dead Crustacean
    • Immortality or Something Like it
    • Strictly Academic
    • Too Much World
    • Wear a Helmet
    • Crossing Paths
    • Brainmatter
    • God on a Stick (boxset)
  • Stories
    • Tristoon the Incorrigible
    • Teeny Weenie Man
    • Venetian Blinds
    • The Speed of Dark
    • Flash Fiction, Vol. 1
    • The Ghost & Captain Kirk
  • Museletters
  • Essays
  • Videos
    • Livestreams
    • Museletter Videos
    • Music
    • Random
    • Writing Videos
  • Free Downloads
    • The Ghost & Captain Kirk
    • Giving it Away: Spoilers as Both Noun & Accusation
    • Becoming a Statistic
  • My Original Music Playlist
Home→Categories SEXUALITY→Sex toys

Category Archives: Sex toys

Inflatable Travel Companion

Posted on March 31, 2017 by Kelli Jae BaeliAugust 5, 2017

Most of my adult life, I’ve wanted a full-sized female mannequin posted in my foyer. Not just for comedic value. For practicality. I’m very utilitarian. I figured I could use her to hold the stuff I need by the door. She could wear my hat, hold my keys, my bag, my jacket– either wearing it or draped over one stiff arm. Or I imagined I could just put her in the house somewhere and dress her up in different outfits. Since my wife and I are always talking about our future life on the road in a travel trailer, throwing … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized, HUMOR, quirks, Domestic Trivia, Sex toys, TRAVEL, Operation Homestead | Leave a reply

Witty Segues: Pariahs, Torches, Movies & Sex Toys

Posted on June 4, 2009 by Kelli Jae BaeliMarch 10, 2013

  [this is a writing exercise I do, wherein I take a list of unrelated subjects and phrases in my files (or through suggestions from readers) and try to connect them in prose…and it’s usually humorous. It also teaches you how to construct segues. The items in this list are, Pariahs, Torches, Movies & Sex Toys.] so…here we go…. I am a pariah. I know this, though the usual response from my friends to this proclamation is a dismissive, “No you’re not…you’re just rare and wonderful.” Like a good steak. So I’m only good for a food source. One of … Continue reading →

Posted in HUMOR, pariah, movies, Sex toys, Monkey, WRITING, ENTERTAINMENT, Sociology, cats, CREATURES, satire | Tagged polydactyl, opposable thumbs | Leave a reply

Pastor was Moved in Mysterious Ways

Posted on March 9, 2009 by Kelli Jae BaeliMarch 7, 2013

Dead Reverend’s Rubber Fetish Autopsy: Pastor found in wet suits after autoerotic mishap OCTOBER 8–An Alabama minister who died in June of “accidental mechanical asphyxia” was found hogtied and wearing two complete wet suits, including a face mask, diving gloves and slippers, rubberized underwear, and a head mask, according to an autopsy report. Investigators determined that Rev. Gary Aldridge’s death was not caused by foul play and that the 51-year-old pastor of Montgomery’s Thorington Road Baptist Church was alone in his home at the time he died (while apparently in the midst of some autoerotic undertaking). While the Montgomery Advertiser, … Continue reading →

Posted in sex, death, Sex toys, SEXUALITY, RELIGION, preacher, atheist humor, CHALLENGES & MISHAPS | Tagged pastor, minister, reverend, autoerotica, rubber, bondage | Leave a reply

Witty Segues: Pariahs, Torches, Movies & Sex Toys

Posted on February 21, 2009 by Kelli Jae BaeliFebruary 21, 2009

[this is a writing exercise I do, wherein I take a list of unrelated subjects and phrases in my files (or through suggestions from readers) and try to connect them in prose…and it’s usually humorous. It also teaches you how to construct segues. The items in this list are, Pariahs, Torches, Movies & Sex Toys.] so…here we go…. I am a pariah. I know this, though the usual response from my friends to this proclamation is a dismissive, “No you’re not…you’re just rare and wonderful.” Like a good steak. So I’m only good for a food source.One of my biggest … Continue reading →

Posted in HUMOR, Village People, pariah, movies, Sex toys | Leave a reply

Quotes from Kelli Jae Baeli

Kettle chips should be called teeth chips because that's what they do. I eat them anyway.

Politics Quotes

"People feel removed from sexism. 'I'm not a sexist, but I'm not a feminist.' They think there's this fuzzy middle ground. There's no fuzzy middle ground. You either believe that women are people or you don't. It's that simple." (Joss Whedon)

Sign up for my Museletter

Email Format

Archives

  • ▼2021 (1)
    • ►January (1)
  • ►2020 (13)
    • ►November (1)
    • ►September (5)
    • ►August (2)
    • ►June (1)
    • ►May (1)
    • ►March (1)
    • ►February (2)
  • ►2019 (8)
    • ►September (1)
    • ►June (4)
    • ►May (2)
    • ►April (1)
  • ►2018 (5)
    • ►November (1)
    • ►October (2)
    • ►August (1)
    • ►January (1)
  • ►2017 (46)
    • ►October (5)
    • ►September (8)
    • ►August (12)
    • ►July (2)
    • ►June (1)
    • ►May (9)
    • ►April (3)
    • ►March (4)
    • ►February (1)
    • ►January (1)
  • ►2016 (23)
    • ►December (2)
    • ►November (4)
    • ►September (2)
    • ►August (2)
    • ►June (7)
    • ►March (4)
    • ►January (2)
  • ►2015 (8)
    • ►December (1)
    • ►October (2)
    • ►September (1)
    • ►March (3)
    • ►January (1)
  • ►2014 (13)
    • ►September (1)
    • ►August (4)
    • ►July (1)
    • ►May (2)
    • ►April (2)
    • ►January (3)
  • ►2013 (39)
    • ►December (3)
    • ►November (2)
    • ►October (1)
    • ►September (3)
    • ►June (4)
    • ►May (2)
    • ►April (7)
    • ►March (10)
    • ►February (3)
    • ►January (4)
  • ►2012 (49)
    • ►December (3)
    • ►November (8)
    • ►October (2)
    • ►September (7)
    • ►August (5)
    • ►July (2)
    • ►June (2)
    • ►May (5)
    • ►April (2)
    • ►March (4)
    • ►February (7)
    • ►January (2)
  • ►2011 (75)
    • ►December (13)
    • ►November (11)
    • ►October (3)
    • ►September (7)
    • ►August (4)
    • ►July (4)
    • ►June (9)
    • ►May (9)
    • ►April (3)
    • ►March (7)
    • ►February (5)
  • ►2010 (23)
    • ►November (1)
    • ►May (1)
    • ►April (5)
    • ►March (5)
    • ►February (8)
    • ►January (3)
  • ►2009 (101)
    • ►December (10)
    • ►November (9)
    • ►October (5)
    • ►September (5)
    • ►August (15)
    • ►July (10)
    • ►June (14)
    • ►May (6)
    • ►April (1)
    • ►March (10)
    • ►February (16)
  • ►2008 (147)
    • ►December (3)
    • ►November (7)
    • ►October (10)
    • ►September (3)
    • ►August (17)
    • ►June (5)
    • ►May (2)
    • ►April (15)
    • ►March (48)
    • ►February (36)
    • ►January (1)
  • ►2007 (52)
    • ►December (28)
    • ►November (10)
    • ►October (3)
    • ►September (3)
    • ►August (7)
    • ►February (1)
  • ►2006 (3)
    • ►December (1)
    • ►November (1)
    • ►August (1)
  • ►2005 (7)
    • ►December (1)
    • ►November (1)
    • ►September (1)
    • ►April (2)
    • ►February (2)
  • ►2004 (11)
    • ►December (1)
    • ►October (2)
    • ►September (1)
    • ►May (1)
    • ►April (3)
    • ►March (1)
    • ►January (2)
  • ►2003 (18)
    • ►December (1)
    • ►November (1)
    • ►October (1)
    • ►September (3)
    • ►August (3)
    • ►July (1)
    • ►June (3)
    • ►May (1)
    • ►April (1)
    • ►February (1)
    • ►January (2)
  • ►2002 (4)
    • ►December (1)
    • ►November (2)
    • ►July (1)
  • ►2001 (2)
    • ►September (1)
    • ►August (1)

Blog Topics

experience gender-identity T3 belief system September 11 cockroaches sculpture adventure genre tension EA Kafkalas AUTHORS oil accident feminism editing atheist humor self-respect Time-Travel donald trump irony tobacco evergreen depression Barack Obama Christopher Hitchens PUBLISHING vigilanteism Akashic Record abuse Fundamentalism RESEARCH quirks mainstream fiction genre Sean Platt First Person plotting Stupidity WRITING LIFE ENTERTAINMENT Sturgis Bike Rally willful ignorance panic memes KB Draper Pledge of Allegiance deer Joe Biden copyright lesfic genre esoteric spirituality PSYCHOLOGY Facebook Building Character awkwardness refunds spoilers rudeness crisis TerraNeo CREATURES Stephen Hawking doughnuts purpose conversation war Mitt Romney commitment BOOKS Pooly Fall Somewhere Else exercise cosmology chemistry President personal ads self-awareness Valentine's Day Deja vu lesbians courage Movie review attributions soliciting Mueller magic religion genre Charles Dickens dating ESOTERICA Bernie Sanders chickens bisexuality paths money repetition menopause cigarettes Pinterest monogamy Photoshop COVID-19 Sleep loneliness US Constitution Vice Presidential Candidate despair walking Impeachment obsession political parties word choice promiscuity presidential debate Pitfall PHILOSOPHY BIBLE strength injury T.T. Thomas Darian North

Books by Genre/Category

authors Private Investigator relationships writers adventure suspense metaphysics Wisconsin humor lesfic essays romantic dramedy detective romance novella family secrets post-apocalyptic nonfiction bestsellers rock band Sheriff mainstream series family anthology music family saga promo science fiction alternate history mystery apocalyptic novel FemFic speculative memoir Colorado scifi BOOKS time travel romantic suspense Women's Adventure fantasy small town thriller paranormal deputy stories lesbian witches female protagonist writing tips memory erotica video abuse fiction police writing travel

https://www.newchic.com/

Quotes for Writers

Make the reader think the evil, make him think it for himself, and you are released from weak specifications. ~ Henry James

Word of the Day

plenary PLEE-nuh-ree; PLEN-uh-ree Full in all respects; complete; absolute.

Favorite Quotes

“No," I replied testily. "I'm pretty sure 'digital' is Latin for 'fingeral,' so finger cancer equals digital cancer. This is all basic anatomy, Dr. Roland." Then Dr. Roland told me that he thought I was overreacting, and that "fingeral" wasn't even a real word. Then I told him that I thought he was underreacting, probably because he's embarrassed that he doesn't know how Latin works. Then he claimed that "underreacating" isn't a word either. The man has a terrible bedside manner.” ~ Jenny Lawson, Let's Pretend This Never Happened: A Mostly True Memoir

My Sites

  • Autodidact University
  • Emoticons – Smileys (smilies) bananas & more
  • Jae on Facebook
  • Kelli Jae Baeli on Twitter
  • KJB Facebook Author page
  • Liberal Female Prepsteaders
  • My Happy Place

Blogs I Fancy

  • Anatomy Notes
  • Being Human
  • Confessions of an Author
  • Fiction Bitch
  • HSP Notes
  • Hyperbole and a Half
  • Reading Writing No Arithmetic
  • Science Blog
  • Splendid Elles
  • Terrible Minds
  • The Naked Soul
  • Twisted Physics
  • Word Salad
  • Written Word Media

Articles I Appreciate

  • Becoming Obama
  • Lost Robert Louis Stevenson Essay Published
  • Neil deGrasse Tyson Lists 8 (Free) Books Every Intelligent Person Should Read
  • Real Reason Authors Don't Talk About Money: My Amazon bestseller made me nothing
  • The Art of Reading on a Screen: Why You Won't Probably Won't Read This Article Properly
  • The Case for Obama: Why He Is a Great President. Yes, Great.
  • The Truth about Splenda
  • Underwater space station

Sites I Savor

  • A SOFT MURMUR
  • Ars technica
  • Atlas Obscura
  • Backwoods Home Magazine
  • BBC Future
  • BBC-Science & Nature
  • Big Think
  • Brain Builder
  • Cracked
  • Enchanted Mind
  • Futurism
  • Gizmodo
  • http://lifehacker.com/
  • imgur
  • Instuctables
  • JWManus-Custom Book Production for Indie Authors
  • Last FM
  • Literary Hub
  • LiveScience
  • Mental Floss
  • Mercola
  • Mix
  • Mother Nature Network
  • MSNBC
  • National Geographic
  • NPR Science
  • Pacific Standard
  • Philosophy Forums
  • Poe's Eureka
  • Rachel Maddow
  • Science Daily
  • Scientific American
  • Sharp Brains
  • Slashdot- News for Nerds
  • Slate Magazine
  • Smithsonian
  • The Guardian-Science
  • The Highly Sensitive Person
  • The Oatmeal
  • The Onion
  • The Secular Web
  • The Straight Dope
  • The Toast
  • The Verge
  • Today I Found Out
  • Vox
  • Wait But Why
  • Washington Post
  • xkcd

My Twitter feed

Kelli Jae Baeli©BestsellingGenreHoppingIndieAuthorFollow

Kelli Jae Baeli©BestsellingGenreHoppingIndieAuthor

KelliJaeBaeliKelli Jae Baeli©BestsellingGenreHoppingIndieAuthor@KelliJaeBaeli·

20h

this is what it's like to have cats in the house

🇺🇸💙ZELDA🇺🇸@zelda229

Treat everyone with kindness @Queen425Taurus @Rickbluewave140 @T0NY4u @Stacey_TheWrtr @BluuWave2020 @Veteran97178373 @VintageEdges @Annie25CO @AnnElaine20 @Lady64Wildcat @DaajYanki @zafarwestern @henseljim1 @JiminyF @mikecollins2141 @Putzy2010 @CookChampion1 @TimTerminator1

Reply on Twitter 1367759521578377218Retweet on Twitter 1367759521578377218Like on Twitter 1367759521578377218Twitter 1367759521578377218
Retweet on TwitterKelli Jae Baeli©BestsellingGenreHoppingIndieAuthor Retweeted
SalonSalon@Salon·

20h

South Dakota Gov. Kristi Noem's family got $600,000 in COVID relief grants https://ift.tt/3sR8Z8E

Reply on Twitter 1367747342984749059Retweet on Twitter 136774734298474905912Like on Twitter 136774734298474905917Twitter 1367747342984749059
Retweet on TwitterKelli Jae Baeli©BestsellingGenreHoppingIndieAuthor Retweeted
LinkedHDTHE ACCOUNTANT@LinkedHD·

4 Mar

CNN is reporting that investigators are looking into certain members of Congress for their role in the Jan. 6th attack on the U.S. Capitol. Here we go.

Reply on Twitter 1367585056760360967Retweet on Twitter 13675850567603609671745Like on Twitter 13675850567603609679369Twitter 1367585056760360967
Retweet on TwitterKelli Jae Baeli©BestsellingGenreHoppingIndieAuthor Retweeted
politvidchannelPoliticsVideoChannel@politvidchannel·

4 Mar

BREAKING: the FBI has been asked to investigate Gov. Ron DeSantis over allegations that the Governor has used the state’s coronavirus vaccination initiative to direct vaccines to select communities in exchange for political contributions.

Reply on Twitter 1367541885057654784Retweet on Twitter 13675418850576547842262Like on Twitter 13675418850576547845284Twitter 1367541885057654784
Retweet on TwitterKelli Jae Baeli©BestsellingGenreHoppingIndieAuthor Retweeted
tried_nukin_itCaucus Characters@tried_nukin_it·

4 Mar

A friendly reminder that banks collected around $30 billion dollars in overdraft fees last year. That’s right, banks collected $30 billion from people who literally have no money.

Reply on Twitter 1367492507450359818Retweet on Twitter 136749250745035981819765Like on Twitter 136749250745035981858330Twitter 1367492507450359818

Load More...

©2021 - - Weaver Xtreme Theme
↑