I’ve been in a really positive place lately because everything is going so well, and I am on schedule for my move to Colorado. It’s 33 more days!! Yea! Things are going my way, and if you are a regular reader, you know that it’s cause for celebration. Anyway, just because I’m in a good space, doesn’t mean i don’t still notice some of those little niggling things that operate like a tack in my shoe.
Here’s a niggling niggler: when you are on the phone with someone, many times over a series of days or weeks, and they never think to ask anything about you; what’s going on in YOUR life, how YOU’RE doing…and when you bait them by saying, “Sorry I didn’t get your call. I was busy on this new project–“
They don’t say, “Oh, what was that?” they say, “Anyway, I was calling because blah blah effing blah.” Me me me. You realize you are merely a sounding board for the sweet echo of their own voice. It’s a monologue delivered to a live, but silent audience. Conversational masturbation.
Don’t get me wrong. I can be a talker, and I pride myself in being able to intelligently discuss a long list of subjects; and I can get on a roll and not only debate, but usurp a conversation if I get all excited about the subject…but I never forget that other people have things to add, and I always give them a chance to do that, especially after I feel compelled to expound on something at length. I apologize for my loquaciousness, and invite them to do the same. And I always ask people about what’s going on with them; give them an opportunity to share, and ask questions where clarity is needed, all in an effort to show them that I care about them, and what they have to say.
Thus, when I come across a person who keeps calling and talking about themselves, but never appears to have any interest in me or my life…well, that’s just patently self absorbed. And I find that I am not keen on answering the phone.
Grateful, now, for caller ID.