God Still Kills His Own
Consider this gem.
A pastor was electrocuted during a baptism in Waco, Texas, after grabbing a microphone while partially submerged. [Another candidate for the Darwin Award]
Rev Kyle Lake, 33, was standing in a small pool used for baptisms at the University Baptist Church when he was electrocuted on Sunday morning. [If god is willing to send his own son into a horrible death by crucifixion, why would he care about some preacher from Waco?]
Rev Lake reached out to adjust a nearby microphone, which produced an electric shock, said church pastor Ben Dudley. [Dudley was also thinking, Sweet Christ, that could have been me.]
Rev Lake, who had a wife and three children, had been at the church for nine years. [He became an authority on advising people about their mortal souls at the age of 24?]
He was taken by ambulance to a local medical centre where he was pronounced dead. [Jeez, I hope he was baptized].
The woman being baptised apparently had not stepped into the water, Mr Dudley told the Waco Tribune-Herald. She was taken to the hospital as a precaution, but was not seriously injured, he said. [I’m willing to bet she might reconsider the act of baptism…unless of course she is devout. Then, naturally, she’ll do anything in the name of god.]
“At first, there was definitely confusion just because everyone was trying to figure out what was going on,” Mr Dudley said. “Everyone just immediately started praying.” [Yeah, good idea. When someone is being electrocuted, drop everything and start praying. That ought to give him the help he needs].
At a remembrance attended by about 1,000 people on Sunday night, Mr Dudley said the congregation would move forward as a church. [yes, as a church who witnessed god killing their preacher. Wonder who will step forward to take his place, considering god’s distaste for this church and its preachers?]
“I don’t know how, when, why, where or what’s going to happen, but we will continue as a church in the community because that is what Kyle would have wanted,” he said. [I daresay what Kyle would have wanted, was to NOT be electrocuted].
If I believed in god, I would have to say this was one of his “signs”–but WHICH ONE?
(a) Don’t do any more baptisms
(b) This is a preacher in whom I am NOT well-pleased.
(c) The Lord moves in mysterious ways
(d) god needed help up in heaven, that only THIS preacher could provide, because you know, an Omnipotent being will always need help.
Once again, god kills indiscriminately, even while his adherents are doing what they think He wants. Or maybe (here’s an idea) it had nothing do do with god, and everything to do with the interaction of electrical mechanisms and WATER.
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