To All The Girls I’ve Loved Before…
I had this nightmare once, where i walked into a party (like i was walking onto a yacht, my hat strategically dipped below one eye…never mind), and at that party was every woman i had ever slept with (and yes, it was a very large gathering, thank you very much). They all turned in unison upon my arrival, with a varied collection of expressions and responses, and at that moment, i felt as if i would swallow my own teeth. It’s not as if i had a horrible track record, or made any real enemies of these women, but the concept was overwhelming in that i had urgent questions that needed answering:
1. Was this a joke?
2. If it was a joke, was i expected to laugh?
3. Had these women all been comparing notes?
4. Was i really dead, and this was my life review?
5. How much alcohol was available to me in that room?
Now, while i am reasonably certain that should this event actually take place, i would have the social grace to handle it, i wonder if I would instead spin on my heel and dash back outside?
I woke up fully prepared to make a few calls and offer any required apologies…
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