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Kelli Jae Baeli

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Home→Categories CHALLENGES & MISHAPS→luck

Category Archives: luck

This-Close:
another bitch of a ditch

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on March 14, 2020 by Kelli Jae BaeliMarch 14, 2020

Change is good, they said. I believe that’s true, most days. Especially since I feel I’ve been in a bitch of a ditch for the last 7 years. Well, not the same ditch. Different ditches. But ditches, just the same. Trenches, maybe. Foxholes. Caves? Anyway, I was ready for those changes we were finally able to make. My wife was about to get a small inheritance. Just enough to get us where we needed to go, if we were lucky. But the inheritance was delayed by various machinations, a few of them due to some abject assholery perpetrated by other … Continue reading →

Posted in HUMOR, crisis, stress, moving, life, luck, fear, anxiety, angst, CHALLENGES & MISHAPS, chaos, CURRENT AFFAIRS, HEALTH, pandemic, change, donald trump, disillusionment, donald trump, frustration, money, SOCIOPOLITICAL, harsh realities | 2 Replies

Fish Should Learn to Walk

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on February 29, 2012 by Kelli Jae BaeliFebruary 29, 2012

I think I’ve moved past my most recent dark night of the soul. This time it took about 7 weeks. Had a couple of things go my way, though, (finding a new apartment to move to, which I love), and an online relationship deepening into intriguing and exciting possibilities….possibilities that become pissabilities…As is the trend with my life, I don’t get anything good without an addendum of aggravation or disappointment. Some reminder that no, fortune does not often smile on me and the Luck Fairies either have a millennium-old vendetta against my soul, have no GPS, or are somewhat retarded. … Continue reading →

Posted in irony, dating, writer, RELATIONSHIPS, luck, lesbians, chemistry, women, Internet Dating, romance, love, Internet, universe, hope, depression | 6 Replies

Stupid, Honorable, High-Road Seeking Fool

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on February 22, 2012 by Kelli Jae BaeliJuly 31, 2013

In a post from a few years ago (two posts, actually, under Going to Denver Because You’re Dead) I chronicled this transition of moving to Colorado to start a new life; again reinventing myself, with the hope of somehow finding my new place in this ever-changing, ever-challenging world.  I got rid of three-quarters of everything i owned, packed a U-Haul trailer behind my Cherryot, and off I went. A journey that lasted 30 hours on many days of little sleep. By the time I arrived in Denver, i was exhausted, lost, and had this sensation of being on another planet. … Continue reading →

Posted in fear, Sensory Processing Sensitivity, betrayal, CHALLENGES & MISHAPS, RELATIONSHIPS, grief, phobias, HIGHLY SENSITIVE PERSON (HSP), sadness, EMOTIONS, conflict, luck, love, sensitivity, hope, PTSD, Relocation, friendship, panic, disability, problem-solving, U-Haul, angst, purpose, exes, midlife crisis, chaos, WRITING, frustration, harsh realities, Human Nature, domestic violence, loneliness, Xanax, Aging, crisis, Driving, anxiety, desperation, Writer's Block, depression, moving, guilt, apartment, change, Social Psychology, aggravation, Colorado, women, despair, disillusionment, trust, stress, need, meaning, Lakewood, anger, life | Tagged anxiety attack, partners, loss | 2 Replies

The Fourth Betrayal

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on January 22, 2012 by Kelli Jae BaeliFebruary 23, 2012

NOTE: So, in my seeking help when i needed it, for my recent betrayals and abandonments, the counselor i went to see called the next day to inform me she couldn’t see me anymore and for a really stupid reason. I tried to reason with her on the phone, but she had to stand by what she felt was her principals, but which was only LOFTY IDEAS getting in the way of her ability to give the actual care she had sworn to as a medical professional. Finally frustrated beyond words and feeling even worse, i hung up on her. … Continue reading →

Posted in writer, friendship, honesty, WRITING LIFE, desperation, self-awareness, frustration, despair, PSYCHOLOGY, email, depression, responsibility, reason, stress, Sensory Processing Sensitivity, disillusionment, RELATIONSHIPS, HIGHLY SENSITIVE PERSON (HSP), suicide, grief, sensitivity, betrayal, luck, Behavior, Social Psychology, ethics, malpractice, problem-solving, sadness, truth, triggers, women | Tagged opinions, outcast, debate, disagreement, logic, paradigms, letters, defense | Leave a reply

Brain Sex

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on February 15, 2009 by Kelli Jae BaeliMarch 10, 2013

For the first time in a long time, I feel that there might just be better things on the horizon for me. I had a phenomenal 6+ HOUR conversation last night on the phone, and it made me so happy to have such great rapport with someone. Communication is vital to me, and last night was a validation of why it’s such an important part of my life. I have always enjoyed what i call “brain sex”–that is, engaging someone intellectually in a way that is so satisfying and inspiring, that you feel some chemical in your brain has been … Continue reading →

Posted in sex, SEXUALITY, RELATIONSHIPS, BRAIN, happiness, Sociology, PSYCHOLOGY, EMOTIONS, phone, neurotransmitters, conversation, hope, communication, conversations, socializing, dating, luck | Leave a reply

I’m having (gulp) good luck.

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on February 14, 2009 by Kelli Jae BaeliMarch 10, 2013

Things seem to be trending my way. Anyone who knows my recent history knows that that is a milestone all by itself. I have been too isolated for a long time and have been trying to arrange a relocation to the Denver/Boulder area, but that’s a process that will take some time. Meanwhile, I wanted to have a social life again. So I placed an ad on Craig’s List. Now, if someone had told me this before, I would have done Craigslist instead of the 40 other dating sites. Hands down, I have had more luck meeting women because of … Continue reading →

Posted in moving, electronic cigarette (eCig), dating, luck, RELATIONSHIPS, BOOKS, lesbians, Internet Dating, SEXUALITY, HEALTH, Sociology, change, CHALLENGES & MISHAPS, hope, EMOTIONS, money, cigarettes | Tagged craigslist | Leave a reply

Anything But Zen

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on October 20, 2008 by Kelli Jae BaeliMarch 7, 2013

Disclaimer: This post in no way represents any doubt about what I believe as far as religion. This is just part of the journey when you seek the truth. Some of it will be hard for your emotional-self to assimilate. But I believe that solutions exist and writing about it, talking about it, is my way of finding those solutions. This morning, after letting my dog, Giz out, and making coffee, I went back and opened the door to call Giz in, and instead of his name I just shouted, “Helloooooo!” A sign of Ginkgo Biloba deprivation? Early onset Old-Timers … Continue reading →

Posted in angst, reality, PSYCHOLOGY, ATHEISM, existence, disillusionment, CHALLENGES & MISHAPS, intelligence, ethics, EMOTIONS, depression, harsh realities, Law of Attraction, life, self-awareness, ESOTERICA, experience, luck, dogs, self-education, fear, Depressive Realism, growth, PHILOSOPHY | Tagged belief, ginkgo biloba | Leave a reply

Things i don’t need.

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on October 14, 2008 by Kelli Jae BaeliMarch 5, 2013

  I don’t need ovaries, nor the monthly hemorrhaging that evolution has foisted upon me; this survival mechanism meant to perpetuate the species via progeny. I have not and will not ever experience life in my womb (apparently not even of the pleasurable, stimulating variety, if present is any indication of future). Even if i were young enough to bear children, I neither have the desire nor the likelihood of doing so as a lesbian who would never, by definition, sleep with a man, and could not fund the artificial process. I don’t need that lizard brain interpretation of the … Continue reading →

Posted in self-awareness, CHALLENGES & MISHAPS, Aging, EMOTIONS, depression, need, life, luck, sex, triggers, lesbians, midlife crisis, loneliness, despair, PSYCHOLOGY, Depressive Realism, disillusionment, Sensory Processing Sensitivity, sadness, HIGHLY SENSITIVE PERSON (HSP), harsh realities, SEXUALITY | Tagged don't need | Leave a reply

Brain Dump: Mortality & Meaning

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on March 25, 2008 by Kelli Jae BaeliMarch 10, 2013

Okay, I know this is going to be less a blog, and more a journal entry, but whatever. Consider it the first in a series of brain dumps. <<–Look, i even made a graphic for it…. Onward…. I usually try to see the bright side of things, and when I can’t do that, I try to see the funny side. Anyone who reads this blog knows that. And often the dark side can be funny, if you know how to manipulate the data. But this morning, I think my brain is in some other gear….PARK, maybe. It hits me like … Continue reading →

Posted in family, Sensory Processing Sensitivity, disillusionment, guilt, HIGHLY SENSITIVE PERSON (HSP), anger, self-awareness, meaning, sensitivity, betrayal, grief, fear, PHILOSOPHY, Social anxiety, frustration, luck, growth, Shoes, Aging, triggers, angst, reality, sadness, aggravation, singlehood, loneliness, BRAIN, purpose, life, midlife crisis, desperation, Sociology, mortality, RELATIONSHIPS, anxiety, PSYCHOLOGY, cats, cigarettes, quirks, despair, HEALTH, CHALLENGES & MISHAPS, harsh realities, exes, Depressive Realism, existence, EMOTIONS | Tagged brain dump, parrot, E Pluribus Unum | Leave a reply

Quotes from Kelli Jae Baeli

"We should only lament our future if we lack the will to fight for it."

Politics Quotes

"People feel removed from sexism. 'I'm not a sexist, but I'm not a feminist.' They think there's this fuzzy middle ground. There's no fuzzy middle ground. You either believe that women are people or you don't. It's that simple." (Joss Whedon)

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The test of any good fiction is that you should care something for the characters; the good to succeed, the bad to fail. The trouble with most fiction is that you want them all to land in hell, together, as quickly as possible. ~ Mark Twain

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loidloyd To open a locked door by sliding a thin piece of celluloid or plastic between the door edge and doorframe to force open a spring lock.

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“It's true, I did say I wanted girlfriends," I capitulated hesitantly, "but couldn't we start with something smaller and less terrifying? Like maybe spend a weekend at a crack house? I heard those people are very nonjudgmental, and if you accidentally say something offensive you can just blame it on their hallucinations.” ~Jenny Lawson, Let’s Pretend This Never Happened

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