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Kelli Jae Baeli

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Category Archives: stress

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Furiously Happy:
My brain hungered for humor. Was absolutely famished for fun.

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on August 24, 2020 by Kelli Jae BaeliSeptember 11, 2020

I am very picky about the books I read, and it’s hard to find anything that doesn’t either piss me off or bore me. That might just be a product of having been an Indie Author, honing her craft for 30 years, or maybe it’s just me being too damn critical. But I never had problems in my younger years. Like say, my twenties and before. But then, I didn’t write my first book until I was 26. So maybe it really is that being an author affects my ability to enjoy reading other authors that aren’t top-notch. Garbage in, … Continue reading →

Posted in Jenny Lawson, desperation, Depressive Realism, Furiously Happy, Social anxiety, sensitivity, Lets Pretend This Never Happened, writer, Social Psychology, reading, harsh realities, ENTERTAINMENT, mental illness, reality, self-awareness, memoir genre, depression, novelist, CURRENT AFFAIRS, stress, BOOKS, coping skills, WRITING CRAFT, WRITING LIFE, Humor genre, distraction, anxiety, Book review, happiness, despair | Leave a reply

This-Close:
another bitch of a ditch

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on March 14, 2020 by Kelli Jae BaeliMarch 14, 2020

Change is good, they said. I believe that’s true, most days. Especially since I feel I’ve been in a bitch of a ditch for the last 7 years. Well, not the same ditch. Different ditches. But ditches, just the same. Trenches, maybe. Foxholes. Caves? Anyway, I was ready for those changes we were finally able to make. My wife was about to get a small inheritance. Just enough to get us where we needed to go, if we were lucky. But the inheritance was delayed by various machinations, a few of them due to some abject assholery perpetrated by other … Continue reading →

Posted in anxiety, angst, CHALLENGES & MISHAPS, chaos, CURRENT AFFAIRS, HEALTH, pandemic, change, donald trump, disillusionment, donald trump, frustration, money, SOCIOPOLITICAL, harsh realities, HUMOR, crisis, stress, moving, life, luck, fear | 2 Replies

Thoughts Before the Knife

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on May 24, 2017 by Kelli Jae BaeliSeptember 11, 2020

I am terrified. I am courageous. I have braved so many things that terrified me. Things I thought I’d never survive. And here I am, “having survove.” I understand that my fear is born of the unknown, where the most potent fear often makes camp. While this is a brand new experience that has no equal, no comparison, I know more now about what is happening to me than I ever have before. And each time I learn more, I have one more tool in my tote to get this job done. I say frequently that You have to be … Continue reading →

Posted in strength, stress, courage, life, menopause, surgery, hysterectomy, meaning, fear, hope, harsh realities, gynecology, GYN, anxiety | Leave a reply

Pre-Op

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on May 15, 2017 by Kelli Jae BaeliSeptember 11, 2020

Had my pre-op appointment today. All good. BP was best it’s been in a while- 128/82, pulse 80-something, EKG, heart normal sinus rhythm, took chest xrays, answered a hundred health questions, got more instructions, signed the consent form. I do feel very fortunate to be with the folks at Washington Regional. The best part of all that was, yes, I can take Xanax up to and including the day of surgery. LOL. Whew. That should help immensely. I was very stressed all day, just going to appointment, and I assume there will be more and more stress as the day … Continue reading →

Posted in hysterectomy, stress, surgery, HEALTH, gynecology, GYN, anxiety, menopause | Leave a reply

Operation Homostead & Dooflingywhatsit

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on February 24, 2017 by Kelli Jae BaeliAugust 5, 2017

While I’m battling The Change of Life, we are also dealing with A Change of Life. Major changes on the horizon, all of which we have chosen for ourselves, which of course, makes it easier to weather. Our decision to make homesteading our goal, had to begin with all the preliminaries. Where? When? How? We know we want to settle in central Wisconsin, mostly because Melissa is from that area, and around Chicago, and her family is all there. She needs to be close to her grandmother, who is well into her 90’s and has had some health scares. But Melissa has … Continue reading →

Posted in change, CHALLENGES & MISHAPS, hope, marriage, Kelli Jae Baeli, sacrifice, DOMESTICA, courage, frustration, harsh realities, menopause, aggravation, moving, stress, Relocation, life, TRAVEL, problem-solving, anxiety, experience, HIGHLY SENSITIVE PERSON (HSP), growth, risk | 2 Replies

Charcoal Thursday Sale

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on December 1, 2013 by Kelli Jae BaeliDecember 1, 2013

I had stretched my budget to the limit at the end of this month, and wasn’t sure when my check would go in, but assumed I’d be spending Thanksgiving eating an avocado pocket sandwich, rather than something with turkey in it, to at least commemorate the holiday. But then, my check went in early, and I thought. “Hey, I should go buy some kind of turkey dinner now.” Well. It was a holiday, and I knew many things would be closed. I just hoped at least one of the grocery stores would be open. So I got in my van … Continue reading →

Posted in HIGHLY SENSITIVE PERSON (HSP), Thanksgiving, HUMOR, aggravation, stress, Human Nature, chaos, harsh realities, Walmart, anxiety | Tagged crowds | Leave a reply

Being a Delicate Organism

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on September 8, 2013 by Kelli Jae BaeliSeptember 9, 2017

Highly Sensitive People are, as the moniker suggests, acutely aware of stimuli. Which is one reason I prefer the designation of Highly Aware Person. HAP. I’m a Hap. A Happy. Sounds much better to me than being called “Highly Sensitive” which carries with it a rather pejorative tint. But HSP is the most commonly used acronym in reference to us, and so I feel a bit obligated to use it. HSPs are often aware of sensory input that others miss. We are about 20% of the population, and this Sensory Processing Sensitivity is found in around 100 other species, as … Continue reading →

Posted in harsh realities, sacrifice, life, crisis, courage, RELATIONSHIPS, moving, coping skills, Behavior, triggers, problem-solving, Relocation, quirks, strength, Human Nature, Sensory Processing Sensitivity, chaos, HIGHLY SENSITIVE PERSON (HSP), PSYCHOLOGY, personality, change, CHALLENGES & MISHAPS, DOMESTICA, EMOTIONS, stress | 2 Replies

Reproach Beyond a Dog (poem)

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on March 8, 2013 by Kelli Jae BaeliMarch 8, 2013

(I wrote this poem years ago, but now understand even more why this issue is such a big deal for me. As an HSP, certain stimuli is maddening to me, and the barking of a dog is probably the number one thing that will drive me insane…anyway, that issue was the inspiration for this poem. P.S. no animals were harmed in the making of this poem). from Yin & Yang: Poetry & Lyrics From Both Sides of my Disposition   Reproach Beyond A Dog A soothing ritual, nightly enacted; a process habitual, rightly exacted: book on her chest, rum tea … Continue reading →

Posted in triggers, BOOKS, stress, Sensory Processing Sensitivity, life, HIGHLY SENSITIVE PERSON (HSP), problem-solving, sensitivity, dogs, Yin & Yang, PSYCHOLOGY, WRITING, harsh realities, Sociology, revenge, CHALLENGES & MISHAPS, poem, poetry | Tagged barking | Leave a reply

Stupid, Honorable, High-Road Seeking Fool

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on February 22, 2012 by Kelli Jae BaeliJuly 31, 2013

In a post from a few years ago (two posts, actually, under Going to Denver Because You’re Dead) I chronicled this transition of moving to Colorado to start a new life; again reinventing myself, with the hope of somehow finding my new place in this ever-changing, ever-challenging world.  I got rid of three-quarters of everything i owned, packed a U-Haul trailer behind my Cherryot, and off I went. A journey that lasted 30 hours on many days of little sleep. By the time I arrived in Denver, i was exhausted, lost, and had this sensation of being on another planet. … Continue reading →

Posted in aggravation, Colorado, women, despair, disillusionment, trust, stress, need, meaning, Lakewood, anger, life, fear, Sensory Processing Sensitivity, betrayal, CHALLENGES & MISHAPS, RELATIONSHIPS, grief, phobias, HIGHLY SENSITIVE PERSON (HSP), sadness, EMOTIONS, conflict, luck, love, sensitivity, hope, PTSD, Relocation, friendship, panic, disability, problem-solving, U-Haul, angst, purpose, exes, midlife crisis, chaos, WRITING, frustration, harsh realities, Human Nature, domestic violence, loneliness, Xanax, Aging, crisis, Driving, anxiety, desperation, Writer's Block, depression, moving, guilt, apartment, change, Social Psychology | Tagged partners, loss, anxiety attack | 2 Replies

The Fourth Betrayal

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on January 22, 2012 by Kelli Jae BaeliFebruary 23, 2012

NOTE: So, in my seeking help when i needed it, for my recent betrayals and abandonments, the counselor i went to see called the next day to inform me she couldn’t see me anymore and for a really stupid reason. I tried to reason with her on the phone, but she had to stand by what she felt was her principals, but which was only LOFTY IDEAS getting in the way of her ability to give the actual care she had sworn to as a medical professional. Finally frustrated beyond words and feeling even worse, i hung up on her. … Continue reading →

Posted in problem-solving, sadness, truth, triggers, women, writer, friendship, honesty, WRITING LIFE, desperation, self-awareness, frustration, despair, PSYCHOLOGY, email, depression, responsibility, reason, stress, Sensory Processing Sensitivity, disillusionment, RELATIONSHIPS, HIGHLY SENSITIVE PERSON (HSP), suicide, grief, sensitivity, betrayal, luck, Behavior, Social Psychology, ethics, malpractice | Tagged logic, paradigms, letters, defense, opinions, outcast, debate, disagreement | Leave a reply

Why not Me?

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on December 20, 2011 by Kelli Jae BaeliAugust 30, 2013

Pulitzer and Nobel Prize-winning author, Pearl S. Buck  said, “A human creature born abnormally, inhumanely sensitive. To them… a touch is a blow, a sound is a noise, a misfortune is a tragedy, a joy is an ecstasy, a friend is a lover, a lover is a god, and failure is death. Add to this cruelly delicate organism the overpowering necessity to create, create, create~ so that without the creating of music or poetry or books or buildings or something of meaning, their very breath is cut off…They must create, must pour out creation. By some strange, unknown, inward urgency … Continue reading →

Posted in life, desperation, despair, RELATIONSHIPS, PSYCHOLOGY, Depressive Realism, Driving, disillusionment, Sensory Processing Sensitivity, meaning, AUTHORS, fear, anger, sensitivity, romance, Social anxiety, friendship, sadness, angst, harsh realities, frustration, chaos, self-awareness, depression, CREATIVITY, socializing, stress, loneliness, anxiety | Tagged introversion, Dr. Elaine Aron, PhD | Leave a reply

Letter to a Battered Heart

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on November 29, 2011 by Kelli Jae BaeliMarch 5, 2013

Open letter to a friend whose heart is battered…. I remember that you were there for me when I was going through a lot and had no one. So I will do my best to be here for you, now. In this life, you have to separate your mental and emotional things, your habits, your beliefs–like laundry. Whites over there, colors over there, delicates there. You can’t throw them all in together or the colors will bleed and what was once pure and white is now sullied. Some things must be kept apart, some things put together, and you always … Continue reading →

Posted in anger, exes, reason, love, reality, betrayal, experience, grief, friendship, CHALLENGES & MISHAPS, Social anxiety, lesbians, socializing, growth, EMOTIONS, frustration, sadness, Human Nature, anxiety, angst, courage, depression, hope, truth, despair, loneliness, celibacy, dating, Kelli Jae Baeli, guilt, intimacy, desperation, music, stress, honesty, women, sensitivity, PSYCHOLOGY, Jonatha Brooke, life, girlfriends, happiness, SEXUALITY, lies, RELATIONSHIPS, harsh realities, meaning, Social Psychology, disillusionment, conflict, communication, fear, ENTERTAINMENT, self-respect, Behavior, self-awareness, romance, PHILOSOPHY | Leave a reply

Agnosco veteris vestigia flammae–I feel once more the scars of the old flame…

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on November 13, 2011 by Kelli Jae BaeliMarch 5, 2013

Most things for me, now, are in the context of being an HSP. My Sensory Processing Sensitivity is a brain architecture that will never change. It is part of me as much as DNA or eye color or ethnic origins. I know that one of my main weaknesses in this life, is that I don’t do well as a single person, and by extension, I don’t do well sexless. Those needs get in the way of my common sense in evaluating the character of some women. So I have been so bold as to place ads on adult sites, seeking … Continue reading →

Posted in SEXUALITY, life, self-awareness, Social Psychology, sex, Colorado, CHALLENGES & MISHAPS, RELATIONSHIPS, socializing, lesbians, triggers, romance, midlife crisis, love, anxiety, friendship, Depressive Realism, angst, Sensory Processing Sensitivity, depression, loneliness, HIGHLY SENSITIVE PERSON (HSP), dating, desperation, intimacy, stress, PSYCHOLOGY | Leave a reply

Too Much World: A Look at Highly Sensitive People

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on November 7, 2011 by Kelli Jae BaeliAugust 30, 2013

In an article in Psychology Today,* I again found comfort in the knowledge that there are others like me out there, and my particular brand of weirdness is not “damage” but an inherent brain architecture I am born with. Just like others are born with blue eyes or musical ability.I speak of those in our species who live with Sensory Processing Sensitivity, which is the scientific term for this trait. More colloquially, it is known as HSP- Highly Sensitive Person, a collection of traits that was identified in pioneering research by Elaine Aron, PhD. Regarding the nature of HSP’s, Aron … Continue reading →

Posted in sensitivity, CREATIVITY, Social Psychology, desperation, PHILOSOPHY, PSYCHOLOGY, Arts, intelligence, disability, BRAIN, depression, self-awareness, Sociology, stress, anxiety, CHALLENGES & MISHAPS, experience, Sensory Processing Sensitivity, EMOTIONS, Human Nature, fear, open relationships, HIGHLY SENSITIVE PERSON (HSP), angst | Tagged intraversion, introversion | Leave a reply

Trauma Biscuit

Kelli Jae Baeli Posted on April 2, 2011 by Kelli Jae BaeliDecember 5, 2011

Discovered that the private garage at my new place is very small. I felt I should maybe fold my side mirrors in, or rub Vaseline on the side of the Cherryot. I did get it pulled in without losing any paint, but hoped I would learn the skill that sardines know. Got everything inside, and discovered that Biscuit was nowhere to be found. I had been so careful. I even closed the garage door after I pulled in, carried her inside, and watched her dart into the apartment to hide, as usual. She has been so traumatized by this. But … Continue reading →

Posted in Monkey, sensitivity, cats, stress, RELATIONSHIPS, change, Biscuit, moving, domestic partnership, apartment | Leave a reply

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Quotes from Kelli Jae Baeli

I spend a good deal of time on the plot, and the twists in that plot, and I always try to do something with it that is unexpected and clever. When you blab all that to other readers, then why would they want to read the book, when they already know all the surprises? Some writers are trying to make a living with their work, just like you are. How would you like it if someone came to your job and told everyone something that kept you from getting paid?

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"People feel removed from sexism. 'I'm not a sexist, but I'm not a feminist.' They think there's this fuzzy middle ground. There's no fuzzy middle ground. You either believe that women are people or you don't. It's that simple." (Joss Whedon)

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34 bestsellers/62 books. #LoveAnimals #Treehugger #Democrat #DisabledVeteran #Humanist #Equalist #LGBTQ #cannabis #MoreSpineLessWhine #BLM #MeToo #organic

Kelli Jae Baeli©BestsellingGenreHoppingIndieAuthor

KelliJaeBaeliKelli Jae Baeli©BestsellingGenreHoppingIndieAuthor@KelliJaeBaeli·

26 Jan

Is it just me, or is something wrong with Al Franken? Saw him on Stephanie Ruhl tonight. He seems off, like his brain isn't functioning. I've never seen him like that. Does he have a health issue?

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KelliJaeBaeliKelli Jae Baeli©BestsellingGenreHoppingIndieAuthor@KelliJaeBaeli·

22 Jan

5 of 5 stars to When She Returned by Lucinda Berry https://goodreads.com/review/show/5284930724

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Urbanartist2Urbanartist@Urbanartist2·

3 Jan

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KelliJaeBaeliKelli Jae Baeli©BestsellingGenreHoppingIndieAuthor@KelliJaeBaeli·

1 Jan

Try #FemFic today. You know you want to. http://kellijaebaeli.com

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KelliJaeBaeliKelli Jae Baeli©BestsellingGenreHoppingIndieAuthor@KelliJaeBaeli·

1 Jan

"New Release from Bestselling Genre-Hopping Indie Author, Kelli Jae Baeli...with her trademark nonconformist approach to a genre."
http://viewbook.at/AllBetsAreOffAW #Apocalyptic #Dystopian #FemFic #WomensAdventure

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